Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For a success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school
When it comes to ways for making outstanding achievements from work in society that is full of fierce competition, different people hold a variety of opinions. Some individuals argues that it is vital for people to relate well with other fellows, while others prefer to study hard in school to make good preparations for future success. In my opinion, both connecting with others and studying hard are beneficial to future development of professional career.
To begin with, it is much more convenient for people to get ahead in a job through making good relationships with people around them. To be more specific, nowadays, there are a number of job opportunities in advanced companies, which usually recruit employees who are recommended by inner staffs. Under this circumstance, applicants could get a chance to have a interview with boss if they happen to know the company's internal staff and have maintained good contact with them. Through the introduction of in-service employee, candidates are likely to get this satisfying occupation even make a great contribution to the enterprise. On the other hand, there would be a couple of difficulties or challenges related to the project encountered by clerks who could not dispose those issues entirely through their own efforts. Due to frequent communication and exchange of various views from other colleagues, people would obtain solutions of those thorny problems according to the opinions of others. Hence, workers would get pleasing grades on the job faster with the help of colleagues than dealing with these tasks alone. Therefore, relating well with other individuals would give us a easy path to develop own occupation.
What is more, studying hard in school is an essential condition for getting a preferable profession after graduation. It is acknowledged that students at university learn a specific major including a good deal of subjects let them understand professional knowledge relevant to the job that they would purse in the future. As a result, graduates who possess technical skills by hard working in college would achieve huge attainments in a future job. In addition, studying hard in university also cultivate many precious abilities for students such as persevere in something that attract them so much, concentrate on one thing without being distracted by anything else. With those qualities mentioned above, people would insist on their task even when things get tough and do their own mission devotional even if someone may bothers them. As a result, graduates would obtain much progresses in work because of these abilities developed in school. From above discussion, we can conclude a idea that knowledge and abilities which are fostered in school would make a vast contribution to people's future career.
To sum up, from what has been discussed above, to achieve future goals of job, workers need to not only keep in touch with people who play a important role in working but also study hard in school since it gives us a period of time to improve ourselves.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 178, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'argue'.
Suggestion: argue
...a variety of opinions. Some individuals argues that it is vital for people to relate w...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 360, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
..., applicants could get a chance to have a interview with boss if they happen to k...
^
Line 2, column 504, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t with them. Through the introduction of in-service employee, candidates are like...
^^
Line 2, column 1183, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ll with other individuals would give us a easy path to develop own occupation. W...
^
Line 3, column 873, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...em. As a result, graduates would obtain much progresses in work because of these abi...
^^^^
Line 3, column 984, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... From above discussion, we can conclude a idea that knowledge and abilities which...
^
Line 4, column 140, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...only keep in touch with people who play a important role in working but also stud...
^
Line 4, column 218, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...tudy hard in school since it gives us a period of time to improve ourselves.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, may, so, therefore, well, while, in addition, such as, as a result, in my opinion, to begin with, to sum up, what is more, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 43.0788530466 77% => OK
Preposition: 91.0 52.1666666667 174% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2552.0 1977.66487455 129% => OK
No of words: 494.0 407.700716846 121% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16599190283 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71445763274 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85914531421 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 274.0 212.727598566 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.554655870445 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 792.0 618.680645161 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 12.0 4.94265232975 243% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 38.7766528837 48.9658058833 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.315789474 100.406767564 134% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 20.6045352989 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.52631578947 5.45110844103 156% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.324888766267 0.236089414692 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0988100524563 0.076458572812 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0735120836907 0.0737576698707 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.20642689387 0.150856017488 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0415730161636 0.0645574589148 64% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.9 11.7677419355 135% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 58.1214874552 78% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 10.1575268817 132% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 10.9000537634 119% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.08 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 130.0 86.8835125448 150% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 81.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.