Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Being prosperous in life and earns high wages are efforts that motivate people to struggle in their lives. Different people use different approaches to be successful. Where some people depend on their ties with some influential people others solely trusted their hard work. If I were asked, I would definitely say that working hard would have a significant effect on a student's life that leads him to success. My firm belief on this is for a number of reasons which I will explore in the subsequent paragraph.
The first reason coming to mind to elucidate my standpoint is associated with the reality that working strenuously creates perseverance in hard workers so those students who work hard usually have multiple ways to expand their knowledge. They trust their abilities and certain that their efforts would be fruitful no matter which way they have to take. On the contrary, people who are just dependent on others can not adjust to deviation and therefore be unsuccessful. My university statistics is a compelling example to prove my stance. A study conducted on the students who already graduated showed that students who actively participated in assignments and thrived hard to get good grades are those who are progressing actively on their jobs whereas those students who got hired because of their interpersonal relations couldn't maintain their jobs for the successive time period.
The second rationale behind this opinion is rooted in the fact hard workers can develop an unperishable connection with their employers. As they prove their worth through hard work and thus gain the employer's trust. Research has proven that people who depend on their relationships are those who are idle and unproductive. Even if they use their ties, it would not help them to be successful in their jobs in the long run. Drawing from my own experience, Five years ago, when I graduated, I was the top achiever of my batch and therefore got a job instantly in a well-known pharmaceutical company. To my wonder, one of my colleagues was my old classmate, who was an idler and below-average student but got hired by the company because of his personal ties. Unfortunately, he could not prove his competency and fired from the job just after a couple of months. It is certainly clear to see, that hard workers win the race and sustain their position in front of their employers.
In light of the above-mentioned reasons, I strongly believe that hard work is the only key to success which not guide them with the multi-dimensional road of success but also strengthens their working relationship in the future.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 168, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Where” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... different approaches to be successful. Where some people depend on their ties with s...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 370, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...rd would have a significant effect on a students life that leads him to success. My firm...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 28, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'mind elucidating'.
Suggestion: mind elucidating
... paragraph. The first reason coming to mind to elucidate my standpoint is associated with the re...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 823, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
...ecause of their interpersonal relations couldnt maintain their jobs for the successive ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, then, therefore, thus, well, whereas, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 11.0286738351 209% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2174.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 435.0 407.700716846 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.99770114943 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56690854021 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87866581448 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 212.727598566 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.528735632184 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 661.5 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 67.1577709948 48.9658058833 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.421052632 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.8947368421 20.6045352989 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.57894736842 5.45110844103 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.136803152184 0.236089414692 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0466097860017 0.076458572812 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0250213887783 0.0737576698707 34% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0955866449475 0.150856017488 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0200215951574 0.0645574589148 31% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.02 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.72 8.01818996416 109% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 86.8835125448 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.