Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In the sophisticated today’s world where we live, people have a desire to be flourished in their vocations. In this regard, some people think good communication skill is the most important quality to be successful in a job. Others, on the other hand, believe that studying hard at school plays a pivotal role in the prosperity of a person while doing jobs. I, for one, concur with the latter group for two conspicuous reasons that I will elaborate on in the following paragraphs.
One exquisite reason that comes to mind is that knowledge and being well-rounded is prerequisite of every single job. People who have a profound understanding of their jobs, are rather versatile and can solve problems more efficiently. Although some people think that individuals only learn theoretical material at school, these kinds of academic information broaden their horizons and equip them with a wide variety of ideas and innovation. For example, a mechanic technician who put a lot of energy and effort to pass some hard physic courses such as dynamic, electronic, and mechanic to name but a few, is provided with a piece of enormous information about motors and their characteristics. However, if this technician only has the ability to relate to people, he or she cannot make its customers satisfied and fix the complicated problems properly.
Second, although communication skills sometimes help people to find a good job position, it does not guarantee their flourishment as well. While being at school, students have various performances at school; some of them always are trying to achieve the best scores and they have meticulous plans to study. Others, however, do not care about their scores and prefer to be laid back. Accordingly, their personality directly affects their performance at the job in the future. To be more specific, assiduous students who study hard at school are more organized and responsible in other aspects of life. For instance, my cousin got hired in a prestigious company owing to his strong communication ability, however, soon after attending the job, lacking the capacity of hardworking and being organized, he lost the position.
In conclusion, having the two mentioned reasons into account, I vehemently assert that being hardworking at school is the most important factor in the success of a person in the future life. People who study hard at school not only do provide themselves with a vast assortment of useful knowledge and information but also enhance their personality in a way that leads to their prosperity in the future.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 222, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put after the verb 'are'.
Suggestion: are always
...us performances at school; some of them always are trying to achieve the best scores and t...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, however, if, second, so, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 52.1666666667 111% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2155.0 1977.66487455 109% => OK
No of words: 419.0 407.700716846 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.14319809069 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52432199235 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93970834552 2.67179642975 110% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.551312649165 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 675.9 618.680645161 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.4635203299 48.9658058833 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.764705882 100.406767564 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.6470588235 20.6045352989 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.64705882353 5.45110844103 140% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.232664728576 0.236089414692 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0765101845662 0.076458572812 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0406908499639 0.0737576698707 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.160399556764 0.150856017488 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0369829141327 0.0645574589148 57% => OK
automated_readability_index: 15.1 11.7677419355 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.83 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.01 8.01818996416 112% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 86.8835125448 128% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.