Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Successful people try new things and take risks rather than only doing what they know how to do well.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Since the dawn of civilization, people have been tending to reach success in their lives. Some people think they can find success if they do what they are familiar with its process. However, it is my opinion that a person who seeks welfare and prosperity, should take some risks in his/her life. There are several reasons for this, two of which will be explained below.
First of all, starting a new business will help a person to enter to the market by making something new to sell. Today, we see a lot of different products around us. The market has reached saturation point in many aspects. So if you want Success, you should use your creativity to make a novel stuff. This needs enough courage to facing challenges. For example, my brother started a new business 4 years ago. He failed two times but he never gives up. He said "the more effort, the more success.". Finally, after two years he learned how to attract new customers to his products. Not only could he earn so much money, but also he could take a big part of market with his idea. He used his innovation to add new features and options to his products. This clearly shows taking some risks is necessary to find affluence.
Secondly, trying new businesses would help people to gather different experiences. If you do not have enough experience to do a job, your chance to do it well is very low. So when you try different fields you gain your knowledge and become familiar with a lot of new areas. Then you will know how to make more money at your business. My personal experience is a compelling example of this. I was graduated in Mechanical Engineering and I searching for a position in our city companies. I worked for three companies in two years. Finally, I found that if I want to reach a successful position in my country, I can use robotics to service a variety of companies. This is because I faced a lot of problems in companies which I worked here that could be solved by some robotics devices. This illustrates that how everyone's experience is worthy.
In conclusion, although some people believe they will find success doing their known works, I personally think taking risks and finding new ideas can make a person rich. This is because they create what others do not have enough self-confidence to do, and improve their business knowledge. Therefore, I finally suggest everyone who want to be a successful person, should be aware of risks and learn how to manage a new business and decline failure possibilities.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 437, Rule ID: I_AM[1]
Message: Did you mean 'I am'?
Suggestion: I am
...graduated in Mechanical Engineering and I searching for a position in our city co...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, well, for example, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 62.0 43.0788530466 144% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2072.0 1977.66487455 105% => OK
No of words: 442.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.68778280543 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58517132086 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67174550305 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 229.0 212.727598566 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.518099547511 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 648.0 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 20.0 9.59856630824 208% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.6003584229 141% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.7167681109 48.9658058833 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 71.4482758621 100.406767564 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.2413793103 20.6045352989 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.31034482759 5.45110844103 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.291573914478 0.236089414692 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0675369221094 0.076458572812 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0744805422342 0.0737576698707 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.190426920948 0.150856017488 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0509074229915 0.0645574589148 79% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.3 11.7677419355 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.33 10.9000537634 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.63 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 86.8835125448 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.