Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? When people spend a lot of time watching sports on television or following their favorite team, does it have negative effects on their lives?
It is no secret that in the preceding decades, following sports teams is one of the significant individual’s hobbies. Thanks to the advanced technology, people can support their favorite sports team by both going to the stadium and watching TV. The controversial question that arises regarding this issue is whether spending lots of times watching sports games on television or following the favorite team can be harmful. From my perspective, watching TV to follow some one’s favorite sports team exceedingly is detrimental. I am of this opinion because of two main reasons that I will elaborate on in the following paragraphs.
The first reason coming to mind to substantiate my standpoint is concerned with this issue that doing works extravagantly will be harmful, especially when it is about an adult person. Most adolescents have their regular and specific lives. They are usually obligated to do specific works and to have certain responsibilities. Often, there are families with who they should spend their spare time, or there is a deadline for an urgent project which they should meet. Therefore, if they want to follow their favorite sports team either on the television or in the stadium, they will be pushed to cancel the other plans or spending less time on playing with their children even postponing the deadlines to the different time, etc so that it has a heavy price that they should pay in the upcoming days. For the purpose of illustration, a friend of our family's used to follow one of the well-known European football teams, and for the technology is omnipresent these days; he watched the games even when he was in his office. After a while, he missed many/myriads projects. He was forced to resign from his work. Consequently, he lost his family because there was no salary to afford the expenses. Had he not followed the football games exceedingly, he would not lose not only his desired work but also his family.
The second reason that has worth to be mentioned is that watching television is harmful work when it is repeated over and over. Without a shadow of a doubt, the fruitfulness of sport and working out have been proved to every one, since watching television is kinds of sedentary activities, can have an irreversible impact on the mind and body of the observer. Based on the recent studies conducted in my country, it is demonstrated that people who follow their sports teams more than usual on television, will be susceptible to get backache more than others, unlike the real impact of what they follow in the real world, means sport.
From what has been discussed above, we may safely reach the conclusion that since individuals in the recent centuries have had hectic lives, and they are obligated to do their duties both in their personal lives and jobs, so they should manage their time and utilize their free time to follow their favorite sports team. As a result, not only can they stay up to date of the games’ result and enjoy it, but also they will not receive any harm. Moreover, it highly recommended that sports’ fans divide their times to two-part, so they can both follow their popular teams and spend the surplus time on work out to profit from its merits.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 28, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'mind substantiating'.
Suggestion: mind substantiating
...ragraphs. The first reason coming to mind to substantiate my standpoint is concerned with this is...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, may, moreover, regarding, second, so, therefore, well, while, as for, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 15.1003584229 172% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 43.0788530466 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2690.0 1977.66487455 136% => OK
No of words: 550.0 407.700716846 135% => OK
Chars per words: 4.89090909091 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84273464058 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72182243274 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 274.0 212.727598566 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.498181818182 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 824.4 618.680645161 133% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 81.9663943084 48.9658058833 167% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.095238095 100.406767564 128% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1904761905 20.6045352989 127% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.57142857143 5.45110844103 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.392051062588 0.236089414692 166% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115559145676 0.076458572812 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0908104393612 0.0737576698707 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.25994158973 0.150856017488 172% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0522158071343 0.0645574589148 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.38 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.57 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 86.8835125448 146% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.