Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
When people spend a lot of time watching sports on television or following their favorite team, does it have negative effects on their lives?
No one cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that all people need to allocate much time to leisure time; this is because it is necessary for their health. Whether spending a considerable amount of time for following our favorite programs, such as watching television, has negative impacts on our life or not is a controversial subject. While many people believe that dedication of a lot of time to following these programs is harmful for us, others repudiate this claim and believe that allocating a considerable time for watching TV programs and channels does not have negative influence on us. I, personally, concur with the former viewpoint for two cogent reasons, which I will elucidate in the following paragraphs. (Unnecessary repetition of TV channels, programs, time, allocating, and so on)
The first reason to point out is that dedicating a lot of time to following and watching sports on television triggers significant pressure and stress for us. In fact, when people become dependent on these programs, their behavior changes dramatically. Besides, they stick to these programs, and when their team loses, they get upset. Moreover, many of these individuals experience heart-attack after their team’s loss. Many experiments have shown that more than 30 percent of heart attacks occur when people get involved in stressful practices such as following highly exciting football matches. My brother’s experience is a compelling example of what I mean. He was passionate fan of one of my football team in our city, named Steghlal. Once, his team had an important game, and unfortunately, they lost; after this, he suffered a fatal heart attack and lost his consciousness. We were able to transfer him to the hospital on time and save his live. Therefore, had he not got involved in the on-going football games, he would have never suffered heart attack, and he would have never jeopardized his health.
The second subtle reason is that when people get involved in these programs tremendously, they become addicted to these shows. To clarify, many people allocate a deal amount of time to never miss these programs, and they get involved in these programs gradually, and after that, they cannot abandon watching them. When this situation happens and dominates, they cannot handle their life or manage their timetable. Then, day after day, their dependence increases a lot, and finally, they cannot pursue other important life's matters. Indeed, this is like consuming drugs, and they have to consume more and more. Furthermore, they cannot go to work, or if they go to work, they will not concentrate and engage in their duties. Besides, their behavior with their family changes considerably; in fact, they do not respect their family, and their family is not important for them. Obviously, all problems stem from getting addicted to football games, which they allotted a lot of time for following them. Had they not allocated a lot of time to watch sport games, absolutely they would have never occurred these disorder, and anxious conditions for them.
To wrap it up, contemplating all the aforementioned remarks, we reach the conclusion that people should not spend a lot of time on pursuing sport games as a patrons and fans. This is because they lead to severe pressure and stress, which have detrimental outcome such as heart attack, and because they become addicted to these programs, which have significant effects on their life.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 568, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...in stressful practices such as following highly exciting football matches. My bro...
^^
Line 5, column 1006, Rule ID: ON-GOING[1]
Message: Did you mean 'ongoing'?
Suggestion: ongoing
...erefore, had he not got involved in the on-going football games, he would have never suf...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, finally, first, furthermore, if, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, while, i mean, in fact, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 25.0 13.8261648746 181% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 83.0 43.0788530466 193% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 52.1666666667 121% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2902.0 1977.66487455 147% => OK
No of words: 565.0 407.700716846 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.13628318584 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87542086881 4.48103885553 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78060589231 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 262.0 212.727598566 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.463716814159 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 885.6 618.680645161 143% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 23.0 9.59856630824 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 12.0 1.86738351254 643% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.0512840191 48.9658058833 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.08 100.406767564 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6 20.6045352989 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.48 5.45110844103 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 3.85842293907 311% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.314645215398 0.236089414692 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0919410180047 0.076458572812 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.052947725067 0.0737576698707 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.198288007904 0.150856017488 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0344127974 0.0645574589148 53% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 11.7677419355 120% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.83 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.19 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 124.0 86.8835125448 143% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 10.002688172 190% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.