Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Privacy is one of the basic needs of human beings. Since the dawn of civilization, people have a different range of private life based on culture, religion, and type of their career. some task involves more interaction with people, So less amount of privacy is probable for its incumbents. However, in every situation, even if the person is an athlete or an entertainer, some degree of privacy should be considered. Because all of us are a human being, and privacy is an indispensable part of our nature.
To begin with, It is best to consider where is the root of the problem? Media like to catch as many audiences as possible, so they do not think about violating the privacy of the individuals. Some may argue that the popularity of the athletes and other entertainer individuals leads to be under such an enormous atack of media, on the other hand, I believe that media look for more income. The more they look into the private lives of individuals, the more their programs sell.
The second rationale to endorse my point of view is the behaviour of famous people. Some of them determine the boundary between their profession and their private life. Unfortunately, the majority of the well-known individuals have no clear boundary; for instance, they share every private moment of their life in social media to achieve more follower and more popularity. Although, their open-mind behaviours gather more advocate, their private life is disrupted as a result. The example of the divorce of famous people is one of the interesting issues for media. If a famous person could manage his or her private life and do not share every aspect of its life, It would be more likely that the person solves his or her problem without destructive opinions of others.
To put it in a nutshell, all the reasons mentioned above leads us to conclude that every person need to have private environment. For violation of the privacy, the media and individuals' behaviour could play a part.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 184, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Some
...re, religion, and type of their career. some task involves more interaction with peo...
^^^^
Line 5, column 202, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'argues'.
Suggestion: argues
...he privacy of the individuals. Some may argue that the popularity of the athletes and...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, look, may, second, so, well, for instance, as a result, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 43.0788530466 67% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1651.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 338.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.88461538462 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28774723029 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71166072415 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.526627218935 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 544.5 618.680645161 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.1044922919 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.1176470588 100.406767564 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8823529412 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.94117647059 5.45110844103 109% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.184463216689 0.236089414692 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0579859569476 0.076458572812 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0340576082163 0.0737576698707 46% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.111990426264 0.150856017488 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0159324838354 0.0645574589148 25% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 11.7677419355 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.41 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.