Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Teenage have an influential and tremendous impact in our society. They are the building blocks of our nations. Although some families refused to let their children involved in a part-time job, my personal experience and actual observation of life, have led me to agree with the idea, that part-time job plays an essential factor in raising our teens for an adult life. I chose that for the reasons I will explore in this paragraph.
To begin with, let the children to participate in a part-time job will give them, the opportunity to exposed to the field of work environment. Moreover, getting into the area, can help teens to get used to the challenges, difficulties and obstacles that they might face in their future career life. For example; I was planning to study the field of dentistry. As a consequence, I decided to work as a dental assistant in summer break, to get an idea about the dentistry field. I noticed how dealing with patients was hard, and need a strong interpersonal skills, and patience. The experience I have got from my working time, helped me a lot in building my ideas, personality, and talents for the future.
Furthermore, working as part-time may assist the teenage in saving a sum of money, which might be beneficial for them in the future. Moreover, earning money, could be effective in buying books and pay for classes. For example; I instructed my son to work in Jewel Osco during the summer break, at the beginning he refused. But, I insisted on my opinion, and forced him to go. After he got his first salary, he was happy, confident and had a feeling of independency,. And he decided to keep the money in a bank for a later need. This opportunity had taught my hero teen a lot about how getting money is not an easy way, and how spending them is fast. It also get him learned how to save and manage his budget.
In a nut shell, judging all what I have mentioned before, taking all factors into consideration, I reinforce my idea, that helping teenage to get a part-time job, is important for the reasons that I have mentioned. Not only to build their skills, but also to know the idea of saving and dealing with money. So, let us as parents, encourage our children to start working a part-time in the summer holiday to strengthen their abilities.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 556, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'skill'?
Suggestion: skill
...s hard, and need a strong interpersonal skills, and patience. The experience I have go...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 465, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , .
...fident and had a feeling of independency,. And he decided to keep the money in a b...
^^
Line 3, column 659, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'gets'?
Suggestion: gets
... and how spending them is fast. It also get him learned how to save and manage his ...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, may, moreover, so, then, for example, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 50.0 43.0788530466 116% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1878.0 1977.66487455 95% => OK
No of words: 406.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.62561576355 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48881294772 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72195014545 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509852216749 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 592.2 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.86738351254 375% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.5878597511 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.4285714286 100.406767564 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.3333333333 20.6045352989 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.09523809524 5.45110844103 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.231572554951 0.236089414692 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0613437216768 0.076458572812 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0615215467467 0.0737576698707 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.157630652639 0.150856017488 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.05436931876 0.0645574589148 84% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 11.7677419355 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.57 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.16 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 86.8835125448 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.