It is important to improve our skills and knowledge as much as possible Some people prefer to learn from individuals who have more experience than they do like teachers and supervisors instead of learning from peers like their colleagues and classmates Do | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

It is important to improve our skills and knowledge as much as possible. Some people prefer to learn from individuals who have more experience than they do – like teachers and supervisors – instead of learning from peers, like their colleagues and classmates. Do you think this is a good idea? Why or why not?

Nowadays, with the tremendous development of human culture, the acquirement of knowledge is more important than ever. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with the statement that we should learn from experienced people like professors and parents rather than from peers. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will illuminate in the following essay.

First of all, the sophisticated people know the answers of many questions. I undoubtedly believe that everyone is unique, however, the situations are repetitive. Besides, the peers might been faced with the very same dilema as we are, and they have no idea how to break it, too. For instance, I used to participate in mathematics modeling contests during college with other three teammates, who were abosolutely brilliant young men. One time we were facing a difficulty involing totally strange field from our own. It baffled us for entirely two days so that we finally decided to find one of our teachers for help. He slightly smiled right after he saw that problem, and sent us some papers he had published including similar mathematical models. Without his effortless assistance, it was literally impossible for us to solve the puzzle by ourselves.

Secondly, the speed of society improvement is not so fast that the gap between two generations is insurmountable. I would like to start with my own experience. After graduation from university I had an opportunity for either entering a giant company in my field or continuing my graduate program in a university. At first, I did not believe my conservative parents would provide meaningful suggestions. Since they had a tendency to steady lifestyle I supposed their suggestion as choosing the giant company, which could offer a promising career. Nevertheless, when I talked with them about the academic promotion, both of them express their respect to high-ranked education. And their perspectives were mostly similar with mine, which was wholly beyond my normal opinions.

In conclusion, I firmly support the idea that we should pay more attention to experienced people instead of peers. This is because these wiseful people are more likely to know the solutions to many problems, and because they share the same beliefs with us.

Votes

Essay Categories

Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 188, Rule ID: PRP_PAST_PART[2]
Message: Did you mean 'have been' or 'be'?
Suggestion: have been; be
...re repetitive. Besides, the peers might been faced with the very same dilema as we a...
^^^^
Line 3, column 635, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ur teachers for help. He slightly smiled right after he saw that problem, and sen...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, finally, first, however, if, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, for instance, i feel, i suppose, in conclusion, first of all, to start with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 53.0 43.0788530466 123% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 47.0 52.1666666667 90% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1883.0 1977.66487455 95% => OK
No of words: 361.0 407.700716846 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.21606648199 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35889894354 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97167305909 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.628808864266 0.524837075471 120% => OK
syllable_count: 594.9 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 28.9003027666 48.9658058833 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 94.15 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.05 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.45 5.45110844103 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.18275753977 0.236089414692 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0466655289138 0.076458572812 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0501983856053 0.0737576698707 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.116149430535 0.150856017488 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0517917266589 0.0645574589148 80% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 11.7677419355 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.7 10.9000537634 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.08 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 86.8835125448 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.