Nowadays, children rely too much on the technology, like computers, smartphone, video games, for fun and entertainment. Playing simpler toys or playing outside with friends would be better for the children's development.
Technology is developing at a high pace and companies introduce new devices, and applications each day. Most children prefer to use electronic gadgets to entertain themselves. This approach has made some controversy; some people hold the opinion that it is better for children to play with simpler toys or spend time outside with their friends. I concur with this idea. In the ensuing lines, I will explain two reasons to substantiate my viewpoint.
First, simpler games encourage them to have more physical activities. So widespread is obesity and other diseases related to inactivity that many scholars are concern about children's health condition. As these application and games are interesting, they can entertain children for hours which can damage their eyesight, neck, back, etc. On the other hand, when children go out and play with their friends they have to do more physical activities to keep up with their friends without feeling exhausted. Take my nephew as an example, when he was in second grade his parents bought him an Ipad for his birthday. His device storage was full of different games and apps and he used to keep playing for many hours. He gained 12 kilograms in only 6 months. Rarely did he have physical activities that his parents returned the Ipad and talked him into going to a football school. After several months he became healthy and on shape again.
Second, simpler games and outdoor activities help children to improve their communication skill. If kids spend long hours on electronic devices, they will have no chance to learn how to make new friends and communicate with others. Owing to the fact that the rivals in such games are robots, children will not get familiar with real emotions and responses and it takes them a long time to understand other people's feelings. Besides, they cannot learn how to effectively talk to others because they do not need to speak while playing. When they grow older this issue can be a big problem for them in education and work areas. According to a study conducted at Michigan University, children who had more physical games and spent more time with their friends are more successful in social works by 45 percent.
In conclusion, according to the aforementioned explanations and examples, simpler and outside games is better for children developments because they will be in a better physical condition and they can learn communication skills.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 204, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this application' or 'these applications'?
Suggestion: this application; these applications
...rn about childrens health condition. As these application and games are interesting, they can ent...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, if, second, so, while, in conclusion, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2021.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 402.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02736318408 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.47771567384 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6742450513 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 225.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.559701492537 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 613.8 618.680645161 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.3765863623 48.9658058833 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.2380952381 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1428571429 20.6045352989 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.38095238095 5.45110844103 62% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.224511742933 0.236089414692 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0633355936735 0.076458572812 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0655220197289 0.0737576698707 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.157902657597 0.150856017488 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0315699845031 0.0645574589148 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 90.0 86.8835125448 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.