The opinions of celebrities such as famous entertainers and athletes are more important to younger people than they are to older people

Essay topics:

The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.

Nowadays, many young-riches or celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, have been existed, and with the development of the internet, their comments or behaviors spread well in the short term. Also, many people, especially teenagers or twenties, usually watch their SNS and other media like YouTube. Do their thinkings affect more young people than older? Some people think that their opinions are more crucial to older people than young. However, young people are given influences by renowned people than older people because the ratio of young people watching SNS and other media is higher than older people, and their saying is helpful for youngs' future careers.

First of all, older people are not interested in current celebrities. For example, in my case, my father usually watches business or politic news. When I talked to him about topics of entertainment, he typically does not know with regard to entertainers today and what are the hottest topics in the fields. Also, a study in KIS. 60% of respondents over 40 said that they do not have any intrigues in entertainment areas. They said that they do not know what hot topics are there and what celebrities are. However, at young ages, the media is almost essential, so, they have a lot of opportunities to see celebrities. This clearly shows that older people do not have many chances to contact famous people indirectly.

Second, the most critical reason for the importance of the opinions of notable people is that teens or twenties can learn many things particularly with respect to their careers. Currently, many people are under a lot of stress and pressure due to this competitive society, so, they did not have many times to find their interested fields and deem what they have to do in the future. Many names tend to share their past life about similar issues. For example, a noted person, who has earned a million-dollar by his efforts, said that in the past, what he decided his career and how he overcame his failures. His experience helped me to choose my future fields and jobs; I studied business and what I can apply it in other areas. Then, by this process, I could be a quant analysis. However, since most older people already went through this procedure, so, they do not need remarkable people's advice.

In conclusion, the superstar's comments are significant to young people. This is because older people are not interested in celebrities today, not watching SNS and entertainment news. Also. their comments are conducive to resolve young people's agony, in particular their future careers.

Votes
Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 212, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ors spread well in the short term. Also, many people, especially teenagers or twe...
^^
Line 1, column 335, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'effect'?
Suggestion: effect
...media like YouTube. Do their thinkings affect more young people than older? Some people th...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 796, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[1]
Message: Use only 'older' (without 'most') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: older
...uld be a quant analysis. However, since most older people already went through this proced...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 184, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: As well
...ot watching SNS and entertainment news. Also. their comments are conducive to resolv...
^^^^
Line 7, column 184, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...ot watching SNS and entertainment news. Also. their comments are conducive to resolv...
^^^^
Line 7, column 190, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Their
...ching SNS and entertainment news. Also. their comments are conducive to resolve young...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, second, so, then, well, for example, in conclusion, in particular, such as, first of all, with regard to, with respect to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 45.0 43.0788530466 104% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2160.0 1977.66487455 109% => OK
No of words: 431.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01160092807 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64833104688 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 213.0 212.727598566 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.494199535963 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 662.4 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.8121470246 48.9658058833 108% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.9130434783 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7391304348 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.39130434783 5.45110844103 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.349921533321 0.236089414692 148% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105787809775 0.076458572812 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.11168983673 0.0737576698707 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.216892113509 0.150856017488 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.069732840275 0.0645574589148 108% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 11.7677419355 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 86.8835125448 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.