In order to attract more tourists the government could either improve safety by hiring more police or improve its appearance by repairing old buildings and streets Which way do you think is more effective | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

In order to attract more tourists, the government could either improve safety by hiring more police or improve its appearance by repairing old buildings and streets. Which way do you think is more effective?

What is the best method for the government to improve safety and attract tourists arouses a heated debate. Some argue that hiring more police is a better way to tackle this problem, while others maintain that repairing old buildings and streets is a more ideal approach. Personally, I believe that hiring more police is a more favorable solution. My reasons are as follows.

To begin with, reducing crime in a city is a great way to enhance security, and hiring more police officers can undoubtedly reduce the crime rate and attract more tourists. For instance, the Taipei City government hired 200 police officers before the 2016 Universiade took place. The mayor ordered these police officers to arrest bad guys from harming innocent citizens an tourists, and they eventually apprehended more than 100 drug dealers, gang members, and kidnappers in less than a month. Two months later, the crime rate dropped from 3% to nearly 0.1%, and most tourists are willing to visit Taipei because they heard of this news. However fixing the appearance of an old building will not decrease the crime rate, because most criminals hide in different buildings every day, regardless of the house's appearance. So according to my city government's experience, employing more police can help the city ameliorate crimes and enhance tourisms.

In addition, improving infrastructure is another approach to increase city security, and employing more police officers will definitely improve a city's infrastructure. Take the Taipei City government again as an example. After the government hired hundreds of new police officers, they realized that most severe traffic accidents in Taipei City took place in only 12 specific roads. After several investigations, the police figured out that some infrastructure, such as traffic lights, were outdated or broken for years. Consequently, they reported this incident to the mayor, and the Taipei City government sent some technicians to fix it. After that, Taipei City's basic infrastructure improved, several reporter covered this news, and many domestic tourists decided to visit Taipei because they heard that the basic infrastructure have enhanced dramastically. On the other hand, repairing old buildings will not increase public security. This is because without statistics, it is nearly impossible to identify which street is hazardous and which isn't. Evidently, repairing old buildings and streets will not increase city's security

In conclusion, I believe that hiring more police is the best way to enhance safety due to the aforementioned reasons.

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Independent TOEFL Writing

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Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 371, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...bad guys from harming innocent citizens an tourists, and they eventually apprehend...
^^
Line 3, column 371, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an tourist' or simply 'tourists'?
Suggestion: an tourist; tourists
...bad guys from harming innocent citizens an tourists, and they eventually apprehended more t...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 639, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...Taipei because they heard of this news. However fixing the appearance of an old buildin...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 802, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'houses'' or 'house's'?
Suggestion: houses'; house's
... buildings every day, regardless of the houses appearance. So according to my city gov...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1049, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...ify which street is hazardous and which isnt. Evidently, repairing old buildings and...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, however, if, may, so, while, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, such as, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 43.0788530466 58% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 52.1666666667 69% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2183.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 403.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.41687344913 4.8611393121 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83701731642 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.523573200993 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 690.3 618.680645161 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.86738351254 375% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.2082979151 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.894736842 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2105263158 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.63157894737 5.45110844103 122% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.349828949258 0.236089414692 148% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.11436419041 0.076458572812 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0945178075301 0.0737576698707 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.261472160962 0.150856017488 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.10829006887 0.0645574589148 168% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 58.1214874552 72% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 10.9000537634 130% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.67 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 86.8835125448 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.