Playing with technology or with toy
Undoubtedly, entertainment is an inevitable and one important part of every child's life which had better not overlook. However, when it comes to the conflictinag issue of wether spending time using modern technological devices is as equally important as traditional ways of playing for kids development, some people believe that being dependent to digital devices for entertainment does not harm developmental process of children, while others maintain the opposite view. As far as I am concerned, I hold this perspective that conventional methods of playing like playing with friends outdoor would benefit more as it carries more weight. I am of the such sentiment on account of the following reasons.
First and foremost, all electronic devices emit blue rays that are significanty harmful in long run. These rays could contribute to a wide varity eye-related diseases such as eye spots. My view on this point has been profoundly influenced by my own personal observation. I remember one of my classmates who was relied too much on the modern gadjet to have herself entertained. In every breaks she used to jump to her tablet to play in spite of the all warnings that were made by our teachers. Besides, I knew that she used to spent a considerable amount of time in front of television, watching animations or playing video games. Unfortunately, she ended up to a detrimental eye disease which made her eyes pale.
There is also another point of crucial importance to consider, playing in yard with friends results in children's physical health. Having physical activities including running, walking and biking help kids to have thier body in shape. There are a lot of investigations that demonstrate one of key factors of modern obbesity is spending too much time using electronic devices.
Last but not least, old ways of playing games like playing with friends or playing with real toys contribute to stress releaveness. To shed some light on this notion, I will bring an example from my own experience. When I turned 10, my father gave me an ipad as a birthday gift which I used to spend too much time employing it. After a while, my parents noticed that I am a little bit aggresive so they decided to take me to acounsultant. She offerd my parents to separate me from the device and make me to spend time with my friends. In this way my anxiety level dropped.
In conclusion, by taking into consideration all the aforementioned reasons I have outlined, we could possibly arrived at the outcome that spending time with friends and playing outdoor would be better for kids' development as it would make them more healthy in both mental and phisycal ways.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 613, Rule ID: COMP_THAN[1]
Message: Comparison requires 'than', not 'then' nor 'as'.
Suggestion: than
...with friends outdoor would benefit more as it carries more weight. I am of the suc...
^^
Line 7, column 375, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...a while, my parents noticed that I am a little bit aggresive so they decided to take me to...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 96, Rule ID: MAY_COULD_POSSIBLY[1]
Message: Use simply 'could'.
Suggestion: could
...rementioned reasons I have outlined, we could possibly arrived at the outcome that spending ti...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 111, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'arrive'
Suggestion: arrive
...sons I have outlined, we could possibly arrived at the outcome that spending time with ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, however, if, look, so, while, in conclusion, such as, in spite of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 51.0 43.0788530466 118% => OK
Preposition: 63.0 52.1666666667 121% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2222.0 1977.66487455 112% => OK
No of words: 449.0 407.700716846 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94877505568 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60321845022 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90058456291 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 212.727598566 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.570155902004 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 691.2 618.680645161 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.8396608761 48.9658058833 143% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.80952381 100.406767564 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.380952381 20.6045352989 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.38095238095 5.45110844103 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.234603181914 0.236089414692 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0602593255689 0.076458572812 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.112032649218 0.0737576698707 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125068706961 0.150856017488 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0578119964807 0.0645574589148 90% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 11.7677419355 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.55 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 86.8835125448 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 10.002688172 200% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.