should art be a part of education system?
Education and its elements are one of the most important issues in each society, which needs a deep attention. If a child gets good education and receives enough education not only about science, but also about art, he can be a complete person who knows about both sides of a human; the body and the soul. Some people believes, it is necessary to put some courses regarding art in education system, while, others disagree. In my view, we must have some education in the field of art and I would like to elaborate my opinion for following reasons.
First, life is not just about body. A perfect education system, is a system which pays attention to both aspects of a human, body and soul, and as we all know, art can develop which person’s soul. So, we cannot cast any doubt in this regard that, art courses are highly needed in education system. For instance, when I was in elementary school, we had some music classes and we could choose an instrument and learn who to play it. I selected piano which was my favorite instrument and learned who to play it in just six months. I believe, this special music class could make a big change in my mind and really boosted the way of my thinking. When I was in this class, the only thing I was thinking about was the beauty of the art and I had this chance to forget all things I was worried about. That is why, I think art must be a part of education system, which can make children more relax in a world which is full of chaotic.
Second, art can make education more interesting. One of the most important issues we must consider, is the way which we can make education and the process of studying more pleasure to students; and art is definitely the thing which can do it. As an example, five years ago when I was studying in high school, I had so many difficult classes and because I was studying for international entrance exam of universities, I had to put all of my effort on studying. Even in those days which I had to study really hard, I did not skip my piano classes and continued to learn new lessons each week. I am sure that the beauty of the art was the thing which could make studying more pleasure and interesting to me. I believe, if students have some courses in the field of art, they can have a better feeling toward education; why so, when they feel better inside, they will have more enthusiasm toward studying.
To cut the long story short, I would like to assert that, we must put some subjects like art, music and drama, as a part of each child’s education. Based on presented justifications, art can make a big change in children’s mind, why so, nowadays they are just studying some subjects which is pure science and there is no fingerprint of art in their education system; which is a big lack. Consequently, this lack will lead to this problem that, when children grow up, they think we are just some corps without any soul; while, humans are more about soul rather than body.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Education and its elements are one of th...
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...te my opinion for following reasons. First, life is not just about body. A pe...
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Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...in a world which is full of chaotic. Second, art can make education more inte...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ave more enthusiasm toward studying. To cut the long story short, I would lik...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, really, regarding, second, so, thus, while, for instance, i think, in my view
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 15.1003584229 172% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 9.8082437276 204% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 25.0 11.0286738351 227% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 64.0 52.1666666667 123% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 8.0752688172 260% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2431.0 1977.66487455 123% => OK
No of words: 545.0 407.700716846 134% => OK
Chars per words: 4.46055045872 4.8611393121 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83169070408 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49547760305 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 212.727598566 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.436697247706 0.524837075471 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 757.8 618.680645161 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 21.0 9.59856630824 219% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 50.982234245 48.9658058833 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.761904762 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.9523809524 20.6045352989 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.38095238095 5.45110844103 99% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.244784867838 0.236089414692 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0896398927549 0.076458572812 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0900479258565 0.0737576698707 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177513592331 0.150856017488 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0670605242495 0.0645574589148 104% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 11.7677419355 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 63.02 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.88 10.9000537634 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.31 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 86.8835125448 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.