In some countries, teenagers have jobs while they are still student. Do you think this is a good idea?
It goes without saying that in such sophisticated world, educational systems have played an important role in developing children. Some people are inclined toward this opinion that having job during education is a good idea for children while others look at this concept through a different glance. From my vantage point, it is better for children to face to real world and be independent as soon as possible. In the following paragraphs, I will illustrate the most outstanding reasons.
First and foremost, facing to real world and difficulties is a great idea to provide children for the future. In this regard, they learn how to interact with different people who may do not have similar opinions or attitudes toward the same issue. Consequently, they improve their social and communication skills which is a prominent factor in developing their self-confidence. Moreover, they learn new skills and try to find their interest for choosing their professional career in the future. Take me as an example, when I was in NY high school, I used to work in a book store near our house. I met a vast variety of educated people and read many books during my free time in the book store. This circumstance helped me to follow my dream to become a writer which was my outreach dream at first. In brief, having job during study not only improve their self-confidence but also help them to find their desire future career.
Another subtle point that should be mentioned is that having job during education time leads children to be independence which is a sign of maturity. In other words, having job give children the opportunity to become independent in all aspect of their life such as choosing career or selecting their major in the university. Besides, children who have jobs during their education, more appreciate the money that they earn and spend it wisely. For instance, they do not waste their money by buying unnecessary material for example the newest Xbox or tablet. They understand the value of money and feel the difficulty of earning some money, hence, they use their money to reach their real goals. They believe, as an old expression says, "Easy get, easy go."
In conclusion, I think, experiencing of confronting to real world difficulties and being independent are the most noticeable foundation for children to become a successful person in the future. This is my deep belief that parents should provide conditions for their children to experience having job while children are still student as soon as possible.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 881, Rule ID: HELP_TO_FIND[1]
Message: This phrase is probably grammatically incorrect. Write 'help them find' instead.
Suggestion: help them find
... improve their self-confidence but also help them to find their desire future career. Another ...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, consequently, first, hence, if, look, may, moreover, so, still, while, for example, for instance, i think, in brief, in conclusion, such as, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2124.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 423.0 407.700716846 104% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02127659574 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53508145475 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79519213122 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 225.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.531914893617 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 648.9 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Interrogative: 1.0 0.994623655914 101% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 40.1672404108 48.9658058833 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.789473684 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2631578947 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.21052631579 5.45110844103 169% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.215865559356 0.236089414692 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0665148375255 0.076458572812 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0682154226465 0.0737576698707 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141103241749 0.150856017488 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0236171012368 0.0645574589148 37% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 11.7677419355 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.9 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.