Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There are certain consideration of factor which everyone can take into account to investigate and examine whether or not offering money for school-age offspring as to for each high grade has adverse or great impact on them. I certainly believe that, it is not a good kind of technique. Someone can evidently weigh the pros and the cons of each reason. The reasons on which my stance is based are discussed in details below.

First reason coming to mind substantiating my stand point is concerned with this issue that characteristic of youngsters. Vividly, even this method seems okay at the first glance, there is a high likely unfavorable possibility which may affect the qualities of individuals. If a student gets used to this rewarding, he/she would not do anything without money in the rest of life. The best example that fit this notion is my cousin. My uncle is a quite wealthy person. He owns complex factory, houses, restaurants so on and so forth. His son, when he was at primary school was not a brilliant student, he hardly do assignment and project. One day, my uncle started to coax him with money. He accustomed of offering money for him in order for each high grades as well as rewarded project he makes. Finally, my cousin who get used to this habit, he is not interested in anything, if money are not involved. It goes without saying that, this sort of encouragement has adverse effect on them which might be permanent habit on characteristic.

Another crucial reason which deserves some word here is that creating an atmosphere of inproper competition among students. It is important to consider that many students at school are already challenging each other in many respect. Since there are quite amount of greed at there, this may bring about the level being increased which might adversely affect ambient of everyone. A vivid example can be given to shed light on the subject is my own experience. Long time ago, when I was at high school, I could still recall that there was so harsh competition among students but more in parents. Everyone was trying to find their own incentive ways, and most of parents choose the money to do so. Once, this competition led to the incident that was about family who were involved in verbal fight in front of teachers and principal. Subject was why some of students were given lower grade than other. It was a terrifying condition. Without a shadow of doubt, even though some hold the view that it has advantages, these upsides can be neglected its disadvantages.

Having considered all the aforementioned grounds discussed above, I am of the opinion that as parents we should be willing to help out the children in greater way to encourage them. Before finding a way we must thoroughly consider liable effects on both schools and children.

Votes
Average: 8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 107, Rule ID: WHETHER[7]
Message: Perhaps you can shorten this phrase to just 'whether'. It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
Suggestion: whether
...into account to investigate and examine whether or not offering money for school-age offspring...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 612, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'does'.
Suggestion: does
... was not a brilliant student, he hardly do assignment and project. One day, my unc...
^^
Line 5, column 221, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun respect seems to be countable; consider using: 'many respects'.
Suggestion: many respects
...l are already challenging each other in many respect. Since there are quite amount of greed ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 257, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'amounts'?
Suggestion: amounts
... in many respect. Since there are quite amount of greed at there, this may bring about...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 653, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the parents') or simply say ''most parents''.
Suggestion: most of the parents; most parents
...g to find their own incentive ways, and most of parents choose the money to do so. Once, this c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 847, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'some of', you should use 'the' ('some of the students') or simply say ''some students''.
Suggestion: some of the students; some students
...teachers and principal. Subject was why some of students were given lower grade than other. It w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, if, may, so, still, well, as to, kind of, sort of, as well as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 15.1003584229 199% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 11.0286738351 181% => OK
Pronoun: 53.0 43.0788530466 123% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 52.1666666667 123% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2327.0 1977.66487455 118% => OK
No of words: 482.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.82780082988 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68556276237 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69788449996 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 273.0 212.727598566 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.566390041494 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 721.8 618.680645161 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 20.0 9.59856630824 208% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 2.0 0.994623655914 201% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.9294546081 48.9658058833 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.1851851852 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8518518519 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.03703703704 5.45110844103 56% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.260527153224 0.236089414692 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0610550048818 0.076458572812 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0500705763681 0.0737576698707 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.148076303989 0.150856017488 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0485061795331 0.0645574589148 75% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.21 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 86.8835125448 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.