Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Training children is an important responsibility of each parent. Children are in age that don't have enough information and need role-models that can learn necessary knowledge from them. Some people believe that it is good to encourage children to get high grades even by means of money, whereas some others hold an opposite attitude. In my view, offering money as praise for high grade has bad effect on kids for two remarkable reasons.
The main reason is parents decrease the distinguishing ability between bad and good by praising children by money. When students want to get a good result in their exams, they should feel the importance of it by themselves. In that case, kids understand that getting a good grade has huge impact on their future success, so they try hard the reach their goal. For example, when I was in high school, I didn't spent much time on studying my lessons. My parents, who were worried about my future, decided to encourage me to trying harder by offering money. As I needed money to buy my computer game, I deceive them by studying hard temporary for one term to get the money. Since I didn't understand the importance of education in my future prosperity, I didn't continue my education which made me to an unsuccessful person. If I had distinguished what is really good for me, I would have better future.
Second, one of the disadvantages of giving money to children instead of getting good grade is to weaken the ability to make decision. If parents tempt their kids by money, they deprive them from the chance to learn how make a logical decision. For instance, statistics demonstrate that quality of decision effects a lot by tempting by money. Researchers' investigation among two groups of students reveals that children who decides for their tasks by their own, without any parent interference, could make better decisions in future. Students that are encourage by their parents have low ability in making better decisions due to parents deprive them from both being in touch with events and getting experience which could help them on making decisions. As you can see, encouraging students to get high grades by money has bad effect on them.
In conclusion, I do believe that parents could ruin their kid's future by offering money to children to get higher grades. Not only parents decrease the distinguishing ability on children, but they also deprive them to get enough experience to make better decisions. I think that parents should pay more attention on their behavior.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 91, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: don't
...f each parent. Children are in age that dont have enough information and need role-m...
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Line 5, column 84, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tinguishing ability between bad and good by praising children by money. When stud...
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Suggestion: didn't
...r example, when I was in high school, I didnt spent much time on studying my lessons....
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Line 5, column 681, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: didn't
... for one term to get the money. Since I didnt understand the importance of education ...
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Line 5, column 753, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...of education in my future prosperity, I didnt continue my education which made me to ...
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Line 9, column 523, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...terference, could make better decisions in future. Students that are encourage by their p...
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Line 9, column 552, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'encouraged'.
Suggestion: encouraged
... decisions in future. Students that are encourage by their parents have low ability in ma...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, really, second, so, whereas, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, in my view
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 13.8261648746 29% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 43.0788530466 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 66.0 52.1666666667 127% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2104.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 426.0 407.700716846 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.93896713615 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54310108192 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70098858358 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.478873239437 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 648.0 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.8504977398 48.9658058833 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.19047619 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2857142857 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.332305361197 0.236089414692 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.108263873824 0.076458572812 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0486991913665 0.0737576698707 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.218391302813 0.150856017488 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.024444530358 0.0645574589148 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 11.7677419355 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 86.8835125448 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 71.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.