Some parents forbid young children from owning smartphones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why?
There is no shortage opinion on whether small kids should use a cellphone, particularly the one with access to the internet, or not. I believe that children from young ages should not have a smartphone. Because owning a phone and having access to the internet might be harmful for them, and also it can badly affect their school success. I will explore my reasons throughout this essay.
To begin with, due to the easy accessiblity of any kind of content from the web, children especially the quite young ones, represent a vulnurable group for this regard. This is because, when a kid uses a smartphone, intentially or unintentially he might click on to some links or download some apps that are not suitable for them to consume. Therefore, this situation could results with affecting the child’s pshychology and personal development. I have a good example for this, when my brother was nine, my parents bought him a smartphone to just reach him all time and know that where he is. However, one day, one of his classmate sent him a video which was a heart surgery video where the patient died, when he clicked and watched the video, he started afraid from any kind of doctors because he thought that all the doctors are bad and their intention is killing people rather than saving. After this unfourtunate situation, my parents had decided to take his phone from him and they did not allow him to use his phone until his fifteenth birthday.
Additionally, having a cellphone could also affect children’s school performance. Since there are great variety of apps and video games which are more than enough to make a one busy all the day, school kids might face with a drop performance on their exams and they can lose their interests on the education. For example, a primary school that I’ve known, decided to ban any kind of smarthphone usage at the school, because they claimed that it distracts kids to focus on their lecturers. After a couple of month, the princible reported that it was a wise decision to make, because the grads of many kids had improved since that time period.
To conclude, even though there are many different opinions on kids using smartphone, I believe that young children should not use cellphones untill a certain age. This is because they can consume bad contents from the web and using a phone might affect their overall school success.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 375, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'result'
Suggestion: result
...onsume. Therefore, this situation could results with affecting the child’s pshychology ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 496, Rule ID: A_LOT_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun month seems to be countable; consider using: 'a couple of months'.
Suggestion: a couple of months
...kids to focus on their lecturers. After a couple of month, the princible reported that it was a w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 36, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
... To conclude, even though there are many different opinions on kids using smartphone, I be...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, so, therefore, for example, kind of, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 43.0788530466 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 44.0 52.1666666667 84% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1974.0 1977.66487455 100% => OK
No of words: 411.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80291970803 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50256981431 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.55691484687 2.67179642975 96% => OK
Unique words: 212.0 212.727598566 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.515815085158 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 605.7 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 10.0 3.51792114695 284% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 58.5119846164 48.9658058833 119% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.375 100.406767564 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.6875 20.6045352989 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.3125 5.45110844103 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.164476102291 0.236089414692 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0606704952752 0.076458572812 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0408540489852 0.0737576698707 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.109919685995 0.150856017488 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0424625072332 0.0645574589148 66% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 11.7677419355 119% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 58.1214874552 94% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.49 8.01818996416 106% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 86.8835125448 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.