Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The impact of encouragement in various aspects of student’s life is increasingly considered by many in today’s era. Nowadays, parents recruit multiple strategies to motivate their children to obtain high scores in school. One of these strategies some parents use, is offering money for each supreme score they reach in their exam. Since some people having school-age children presume that money could be a superb incitement for children’s effort, they pledge they will give their children money if adolescents get high grades; While others might find action bizarre and presume that it has drawbacks. I concur with the question and am inclined to state that parents should not motivate their children by offering money. I cling to this viewpoint for a couple of reasons and will shed light upon them in the following.
Most importantly, allocation of money as award for children’s high score causes lack of their self-aplomb. The reason is that offering money to children, parents lead them to believe that that they are respectful and potent only if they reach high grade in exams. If students get low score, no longer they would get pleasure of themselves. An example of my own brings this fact home. My 10 years old nephew, Ali, uses to receive 30 dollars from his parents for each 20 score. All his attempt is getting 20. Once his parents found him depressed. As they consulted with a psychologist, they realized that whenever Ali gets deprived of award because of low score, he loses his self-confidence.
Furthermore, should some parents offer monetary motivation for their children, they would cause problem for other families who cannot afford supporting this financial motivational strategy for their children. As a result, the students who their parents are not wealthy enough to offer money as motivational mechanism to children, will not satisfied enough of their parents and they might stop making effort of studying hardly. Putting this in a more vivid picture, the story of my childhood years makes my reason clearer. When I was 9, my father used to charge my bank account for my high scores. As my friends realized this fact, they started forcing their parents to give them money. Due to the fact that fulfilling my friends’ request was not feasible for their parents, an heartbreaking argument happened in their families and the relationship between my friends and their parents became
Weakened. Overtime, my friends lost their motivation and couldn’t passed their other exams despite their brilliant performance before occurred issues.
In conclusion, bearing the illustrated points in my mind leads me to firmly believe that offering money not only cause lack of self-confidence for children but also disturbs the life of other students who their parents cannot afford giving them money as high score award.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 184, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: that
... children, parents lead them to believe that that they are respectful and potent only if ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 509, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Once” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...0 score. All his attempt is getting 20. Once his parents found him depressed. As the...
^^^^
Line 3, column 693, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ow score, he loses his self-confidence. Furthermore, should some parents offer m...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 142, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to support'.
Suggestion: to support
...em for other families who cannot afford supporting this financial motivational strategy fo...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 340, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'satisfy'
Suggestion: satisfy
...ational mechanism to children, will not satisfied enough of their parents and they might ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 775, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...est was not feasible for their parents, an heartbreaking argument happened in thei...
^^
Line 5, column 892, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ween my friends and their parents became Weakened. Overtime, my friends lost thei...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 67, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[4]
Message: The verb 'couldn't' requires base form of this verb: 'pass'
Suggestion: pass
...ends lost their motivation and couldn’t passed their other exams despite their brillia...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 152, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ant performance before occurred issues. In conclusion, bearing the illustrated p...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 234, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to give'.
Suggestion: to give
...tudents who their parents cannot afford giving them money as high score award.
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 273, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... giving them money as high score award.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, if, so, while, in conclusion, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 71.0 43.0788530466 165% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2393.0 1977.66487455 121% => OK
No of words: 461.0 407.700716846 113% => OK
Chars per words: 5.19088937093 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63367139033 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7114967462 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.524945770065 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 698.4 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 68.3422506444 48.9658058833 140% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.772727273 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.9545454545 20.6045352989 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.95454545455 5.45110844103 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.375570866012 0.236089414692 159% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.12060122111 0.076458572812 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0743066284854 0.0737576698707 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.209280511823 0.150856017488 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104067281263 0.0645574589148 161% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.82 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.6 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 86.8835125448 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 88.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.5 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.