Some people have ambitious dreams and keep pursuing them, but other people always focus on realistic goals and try to achieve them. Which do you think is better and why?
Evidently, as the result of the education technology and the development of modern society, all the prevalent changes are combined together, thereby inducing greater revolution in peoples’ mind and activity. Because embracing greatly such a revolution, more and more people will lay a profound or tremendous dream in their mind. However, as far as I am concerned, the goals which are simple and easily achieve are better by contrast.
Above all, the ambitious dreams will lead a large number of lacks for people and go astray, hence lead people are quite easily give up their dreams. However, with the accelerating development of modern society, people are always tend to solid a tremendous dream in their mind. That is because people can contract a kind of sense of comfort which can give a indirect encourage for people. Consequently, people will finish some epsilonss because of these ambitious dreams. On the other hand, it is undesirable that people build up a unprecedented dreams in their mind. That is because these giant dreams will take people into a comfort zone. As we all know, the big dreams will create a distance perception to people, which means people will spend massive time on the tremendous dreams. Gradually, people will consider that the giant dreams is difficult achieve, and they may use the studying time to relax and entertainment. Consequently, the time is wasted and the working efficiency is affected. In the end, people will give up these dreams in natural.
Second, building a simple dream can help people to increase their working efficiency and get approvals and salaries in their profession. By saying that I mean people can maintain a feeling of satisfaction in their mind, provided they solid a easy dreams. As we all know the simple dreams are easily achieved by people. People will be proud of themselves as people acquire their dreams. Hence, people will get a good mind and favourable state in their working or studying. After that people will achieve a high working efficiency in their career and be paid more attention by their superiors. Consequently, people will get a higher status in company and achieve more salaries.
In a nutshell, a simple dream not only can help people finish their mission but also can achieve some benefits in their career.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 189, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... inducing greater revolution in peoples’ mind and activity. Because embracing gre...
^^
Line 3, column 43, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...ove all, the ambitious dreams will lead a large number of lacks for people and go astray, hence l...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 356, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...kind of sense of comfort which can give a indirect encourage for people. Conseque...
^
Line 3, column 530, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... it is undesirable that people build up a unprecedented dreams in their mind. Tha...
^
Line 3, column 546, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'dream'?
Suggestion: dream
...le that people build up a unprecedented dreams in their mind. That is because these gi...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 241, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...tion in their mind, provided they solid a easy dreams. As we all know the simple ...
^
Line 5, column 256, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ind, provided they solid a easy dreams. As we all know the simple dreams are easil...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, hence, however, if, may, second, so, i mean, kind of, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 9.8082437276 194% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 52.1666666667 77% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1924.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 382.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.03664921466 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42095241839 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68112928891 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 212.727598566 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.455497382199 0.524837075471 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 587.7 618.680645161 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.9591605087 48.9658058833 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.619047619 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.1904761905 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.57142857143 5.45110844103 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.23216769825 0.236089414692 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0933174114671 0.076458572812 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0352582219136 0.0737576698707 48% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.155256205564 0.150856017488 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0361326231226 0.0645574589148 56% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 11.7677419355 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.92 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.