For success in a future job, it is more important to have the ability to relate well to people than studying hard in school.
In todays' copetitive life, we all need to have a good job and succeed in our career. However there is an active controversy over whether being hardworking is more important or doing good networking and coomunicate well with people. I personally, tend to adhere to the viewpoint that having the ability to interact with other people play crucial role in our prosperity in our future job. The following paragraphs will elaborate more on this issue.
To begin with, almost all the companies and institutions have interveiw for their applicants. In order to succeed in this firt step we should be able to present our abilities and merits appropriately. If we are incapable to introduce ourself to the superiors then they would not accept us. That is because they initially need the employees who are proffessional in interacting with other people, especially in companies which have a lots of clients. Consider my own experience as an example. One of my high school clasmates and I were simultanously informed about a job vacancy in the greatest litterary journals of our city. We both were the top students who were always considered as the most harworking ones. We went to that journal office for the interview. I explain everything about my experiences and competences of witing and editing. However, he just told them that he had good grades in school. I knew that both are in the same level of profesciancy, nevertheless the commitee assum that he has nothing to offer to the office. Due to this fact they accept me for that jib position. This example clearly demonstrate how could the networking and communication ability lead us to the great work opportunities.
In the other hand, we, actually, it is necessory to be able to interact with others in order to responde to the clients' needs. When we are in a company with a great number of co-worker and clients, we have no choice but intering in contact with them to fullfill all the questions and inqueries. Imagine a situation in which some employee is responsible for query sector. If this person know everything about his work exept have enough attention and responsibilty to answering the question, his information and subtle knowledge are to no use. Therefore, he will be considered as a usless employee and there will be the possibility that the company decide to deport him. In the other hand, if we show our capability of networking and our karismatic face in front of our boss, they may decide to promote us.
Drawing upon the aformentioned reasons, the merits of being a person with the ability of relating with people sugar-coat the advantageous of being hardworking in school. Not only could the communication ability lead us to succeed in interveiws for important job vacancies, but also it could help us to look like a better and worthier employee for the company as well as increase our chance to get promotion in our job.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 86, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...e a good job and succeed in our career. However there is an active controversy over whe...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 202, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...our abilities and merits appropriately. If we are incapable to introduce ourself t...
^^
Line 3, column 341, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...cause they initially need the employees who are proffessional in interacting with other...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 432, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a lot' or simply 'lots'?
Suggestion: a lot; lots
...ple, especially in companies which have a lots of clients. Consider my own experience ...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 176, Rule ID: A_GREAT_NUMBER_OF_NN[1]
Message: Did you mean ''?
...are in a company with a great number of co-worker and clients, we have no choice but inte...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 579, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...se. Therefore, he will be considered as a usless employee and there will be the p...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, however, if, look, may, nevertheless, so, then, therefore, well, as well as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 73.0 52.1666666667 140% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2404.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 493.0 407.700716846 121% => OK
Chars per words: 4.87626774848 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71206996034 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89227159751 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 251.0 212.727598566 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509127789047 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 768.6 618.680645161 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.0142645471 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.16 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.72 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.44 5.45110844103 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.190887172935 0.236089414692 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0482123258329 0.076458572812 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0496424033829 0.0737576698707 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142036881959 0.150856017488 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0794996742005 0.0645574589148 123% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 11.7677419355 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.23 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 86.8835125448 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.