tpo 24
Nowadays, as time passes and people become more developed, they become more aware of the importance of children upbringing due to the fact that children are the cornerstone of a successful society. Hence, parents should pay more attention to their children's upbringing, so as to appropriately prepare them for the future. With this in mind, some believe that taking a part-time job is a proper method to prepare teenage-children for the future, while others hold the opposite view. I, personally, subscribe to the first attitude based on quite a few reasons, three of the most substantial of which are elaborated upon hereunder.
The most compelling reason is that in today's modern world, given the existing economic situation, one is required to be more conservative considering spending money. Unless, a person knows how to spend his or her money in an appropriate manner, he or she may confront with serious plights in the life. Taking a part-time job teaches teenage children how to manage their own money. Moreover, they perceive the value of money, and learning how to spend their money in a proper manner. I clarify my point of view with a real story happened to my brother: when my brother was a child, he did not understand the value of money at all. He constantly spent his own money meaninglessly. When he attended to high school, he started to work in a library as a cashier, which helped him to understand the value of money, and save money.
Another interpretation as to why I do not concur with the latter perspective in the introductory paragraph lies in the fact that without any shadow of a doubt, choosing and commencing a job is an inevitable juncture in the life of most people, since nowadays, it is impossible to live without money. It is statically proven that when people begin to work for the first time, most people have a difficulty to accustom themselves to workplace's atmosphere, which affects not only the quality of their working, but also their overall job satisfaction. Therefore, taking a job in an early time gives children an opportunity to be familiar with the workplace's atmosphere, which helps them to work better in the future.
Last but not the least, according to a research conducted by one of the most reputable universities in my country, teenage year plays a pivotal role in people's behavior owing to the fact that at such age, individuals' personality is forming. So, it is crystal clear that if children learn proper behaviors during this time, they can benefit from them in the future. Taking a part-time job teaches children significant principles, which aids them to behave more logically in their adulthood. For example, by working, they can learn the importance of commitment and time management, which helps them to do their duties better in the future.
In summary, having considered all the aforementioned arguments discussed above, I firmly endorse my point of view that even though working in younger age has some disadvantages, the merits of it outweigh its demerits on the grounds that it gives teenage children a chance to acquire valuable experiences, which brings societies about more qualified individuals, and thus healthy community in general and helps people to be more successful in particular.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 271, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...ttention to their childrens upbringing, so as to appropriately prepare them for the futu...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 219, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an appropriate manner" with adverb for "appropriate"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...son knows how to spend his or her money in an appropriate manner, he or she may confront with serious pl...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 463, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a proper manner" with adverb for "proper"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
..., and learning how to spend their money in a proper manner. I clarify my point of view with a real...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 644, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'workplaces'' or 'workplace's'?
Suggestion: workplaces'; workplace's
... an opportunity to be familiar with the workplaces atmosphere, which helps them to work be...
^^^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'hence', 'if', 'may', 'moreover', 'so', 'therefore', 'thus', 'while', 'as to', 'for example', 'in general', 'in particular', 'in summary']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.211221122112 0.229887763892 92% => OK
Verbs: 0.150165016502 0.158761421928 95% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0907590759076 0.0866891130778 105% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0544554455446 0.046263068375 118% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0693069306931 0.0685040099705 101% => OK
Prepositions: 0.123762376238 0.118717715034 104% => OK
Participles: 0.0412541254125 0.0351676179071 117% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.9143044811 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Infinitives: 0.042904290429 0.0309702414327 139% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.100660066007 0.0887237588012 113% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00660066006601 0.0209618222197 31% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.023102310231 0.0139019557991 166% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3266.0 2387.08602151 137% => OK
No of words: 545.0 408.028673835 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.99266055046 5.86048508987 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83169070408 4.48200974243 108% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.370642201835 0.338922669872 109% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.278899082569 0.251872472559 111% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.201834862385 0.174417080927 116% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.133944954128 0.112833075102 119% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9143044811 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 277.0 212.727598566 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.508256880734 0.524397521467 97% => OK
Word variations: 61.7578285199 59.2087087015 104% => OK
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6684587814 92% => OK
Sentence length: 28.6842105263 20.5533526081 140% => OK
Sentence length SD: 88.190111945 48.84282405 181% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 171.894736842 120.699889404 142% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.6842105263 20.5533526081 140% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.842105263158 0.644075263715 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.54480286738 72% => OK
Readability: 56.5741187832 45.7405998639 124% => OK
Elegance: 1.3734939759 1.45489161554 94% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.300154397459 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.124692542733 0.103427244359 121% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0534280378995 0.0752933317313 71% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.57926532143 0.497263757937 116% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.151040406931 0.151897553556 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.114077575197 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0781384742642 0% => The sentences are too close to each other.
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.406895679942 0.336927656856 121% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0682900726241 0.067059652881 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.210909579961 0% => The content is off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0618886996521 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8870967742 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.86379928315 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.91756272401 61% => OK
Positive topic words: 11.0 8.42114695341 131% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 2.4623655914 122% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 2.75985663082 72% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 13.6433691756 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.