A university has money in its budget to do one thing to improve its facilities for students. It can either improve the quality of the technology (for example computers and printers) that it provides for students or it can redesign spaces where students hold club meetings and gather with friends in their spare time to make these areas more comfortable and appealing. Which idea do you prefer and why?
The question is whether a dean of the university should spend money for improving technology or redesigning or recreating spaces which help students to gather with each other in the break times. Everyone with regard to his private view point can maintain a specific direction toward this statement; however, I am inclined to affirm that establishing rooms for rest and gathering can provide some merits for the young to reinforce their skills and performance during university life. I feel this way for some reasons, which I will explore them in following essay to empower my vantage point:
To begin with, nobody could overlook this fact that such a technology- driven world requires humans to be up-dated. One of the most crucial ways for achieving the mentioned goal is that human beings communicate with each other to gain new and different experiences. Building such a great area in a university assists students to meet various types of characters; therefore, they have a chance to associate with them for acquiring extra information. For instance, I remember that there was a small room in my university for resting or gathering purposes. In that time, I was unhappy with my field- software engineer- because it was very tough for my soul. One day I could get familiar with a girl from history department then since from childhood, I liked to become an archaeologist, so I was willing to make a friendship with her. Thus we started talking with together, finally she could convince me to drop my current field and follow my heart. Now, due to her helps, I am a prosperous archaeologist. In short, in such comfortable areas, students have an opportunity to receive new experiences from each other.
The second reason for my argument lies the reality that the young people usually wrestle with a great number of troubles during living in the university such as homesick, the pressure of courses and the dormitory problems and list goes on. Among heavy classes, the young can go to rest spaces to drink a cup of coffee, eat a snack or play a game with their friends. One should not forget that all of these activities cause students to secrete more Dopamine- a neural messenger in the brain. It goes without saying that this chemical substance is responsible for happiness and concentration; hence, students can avoid any stress, anxiety or suicide thoughts. In this circumstance, the youths will be able to improve their performance and function in their lessons.
Moreover, there is a bit of different here. Constructing meeting rooms creates a bed for students to boost their interpersonal skills such as ability of making new friends or increasing self-confidence. To elucidate, take my own experiences. I had always social problem in confronting with people; however, the same aforementioned room above in my university could remove this negative habit from my personality. I could make new friends and discussing with them helped me to optimize my self-esteem and also guaranteed my future job- because I did not have fear in cope with interviewer.
To sum up, this conclusion could be drawn that if university spends its budget for resting and meeting rooms can obtain a lot of advantages such as students with high and pleasure spirit and even sometimes the young can consult with each other to design new and useful research projects.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 832, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
... willing to make a friendship with her. Thus we started talking with together, final...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, hence, however, if, look, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, thus, even so, for instance, i feel, in short, of course, such as, to begin with, to sum up, with regard to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 79.0 52.1666666667 151% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2803.0 1977.66487455 142% => OK
No of words: 559.0 407.700716846 137% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01431127013 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.86242540663 4.48103885553 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85856873663 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 310.0 212.727598566 146% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.554561717352 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 859.5 618.680645161 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 67.4451261495 48.9658058833 138% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.409090909 100.406767564 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.4090909091 20.6045352989 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.5 5.45110844103 156% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.253858150208 0.236089414692 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.077037924543 0.076458572812 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0721253280196 0.0737576698707 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.166581072648 0.150856017488 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0713332826087 0.0645574589148 110% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 58.1214874552 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.52 8.01818996416 106% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 86.8835125448 148% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 10.002688172 185% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.