The following appeared in a memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the ma

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores.

"Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the magazine. The three Fish Emporium stores in Gulf City saw an even greater increase than that. Because Top Dog Pet Stores is based in Gulf City, it seems clear that we should start placing our own ads in Exotic Pets Monthly. If we do so, we will be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again."

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

In this memo, the director of top dog pet stores argues that top dog pet stores should start placing its ads in exotic pets monthly for more sales. Although the argument may seem convincing at first, the unwarranted assumptions lead me to question the validity of the argument.

first, the director assumes that fish emporium has advertised in the magazine exotic pets monthly, so sales of their stores have increased. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent. however, it is possible that sales increase is not due to the advertisement of the stores, but due to other conditions, such as a diversity of fish in their stores, expansion of the stores, and increasing interests of people for fish pet. therefore, advertising magazine is not the crucial reason of success of fish emporium.

Another assumption the director makes is that top dog pet stores should start placing its own ads in the magazine, because it is based in gulf city. The three fish emporium stores in gulf city saw an even greater increase than 15 percent. however, it is plausible that people in gulf city live near the ocean, so they are interested in fish for pet, not dog. even if they are interested in dog pet, exotic pets monthly might not be helpful for top dog pet stores, because dogs might not exotic pets. Readers of the magazine, even living in gulf city, actually might not be attracted to the advertisement in exotic pets monthly. Indeed, top dog pet stores does not need to start placing its ads in the magazine.

Lastly, that top dog pet stores should advertise in exotic pets monthly is based on the assumption that it will make more profit. The advertising may help increase the sales of the stores. however, expenses of advertising might be more significant than incomes. actually, expenses of ads may be substantial because the magazine may not be for gulf city, but for more district. therefore, it is likely that the sales from people in gulf city are more minute than expenses, and thus, the profit is marginal.

In brief, the director’s claim that top dog pet stores should start advertising in exotic pets monthly is unconvincing on many grounds. To bolster it, he needs to rethink his assumptions.

Votes
Average: 8.8 (4 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
In this memo, the director of top dog pe...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tion the validity of the argument. first, the director assumes that fish em...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 11, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: First
...alidity of the argument. first, the director assumes that fish emporiu...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 198, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...tores saw sales increase by 15 percent. however, it is possible that sales increase is ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 437, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...asing interests of people for fish pet. therefore, advertising magazine is not the crucia...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eason of success of fish emporium. Another assumption the director makes is...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 250, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
... even greater increase than 15 percent. however, it is plausible that people in gulf ci...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 370, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Even
...re interested in fish for pet, not dog. even if they are interested in dog pet, exot...
^^^^
Line 13, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t placing its ads in the magazine. Lastly, that top dog pet stores should a...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 200, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
... help increase the sales of the stores. however, expenses of advertising might be more ...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 273, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Actually
...might be more significant than incomes. actually, expenses of ads may be substantial bec...
^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 388, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...e for gulf city, but for more district. therefore, it is likely that the sales from peopl...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... and thus, the profit is marginal. In brief, the director's claim that...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, however, if, lastly, may, so, therefore, thus, in brief, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 28.8173652695 94% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1846.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 379.0 441.139720559 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.87071240106 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41224685777 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6136132926 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 156.0 204.123752495 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.411609498681 0.468620217663 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 567.0 705.55239521 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.739977087 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.1578947368 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.9473684211 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.52631578947 5.70786347227 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.20758483034 183% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.442165562446 0.218282227539 203% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.164050756925 0.0743258471296 221% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.110258530271 0.0701772020484 157% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.272445192538 0.128457276422 212% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.096294845297 0.0628817314937 153% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.3550499002 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.97 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.5 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 379 350
No. of Characters: 1770 1500
No. of Different Words: 140 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.412 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.67 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.475 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 124 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 87 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.583 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.107 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.461 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.689 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.148 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5