3. "During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than at the nearby Panoply Industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than ours. Experts say that significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents are fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers. Therefore, to reduce the number of on-the-job accidents at Quiot and thereby increase productivity, we should shorten each of our three work shifts by one hour so that employees will get adequate amounts of sleep."
In a memo from the Vice President of quoit manufacturing, it stated that quiot manufacturing had 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than at the nearby panoply industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than here. Experts say that some significant contributing factors are fatigue and sleep deprivation among the workers at the quoit manufacturing. so in order to reduce the number of on-the-job accidents at quoit and thereby increase the productivity, they are thinking of shortening each of their three work shifts by one hour so that employees would get adequate amount of sleep.
Before analyzing the above argument stated by the author, two questions have to answered. Firstly, is the claim that there has been a 30 percent increase in the on-job accidents at quiot manufacturing than at the nearby panoply industries plant valid? The argument stated by the auithor had been very vague where there has been no specific evidence like surveys and statistics that might support the author's argument about both quoit manufacturing and panoply industries. so as a result we cannot come to terms with the author's hypothesis from the above lines which showcase a 30 percent rise in the on-job accidents than that of panoply industries.
Secondly, is the work hours the only reason why there has been an increase in the on-job accidents at quoit? The above argument provides some vague details about the actual reason behind the on-job accidents at quoit which might be bigger than the working hours of the employees. this might include various other factors like rough working conditions and outdated machine technology at the industry resulting in frequent on-job accidents at quoit manufacturing. so due to this indicating a mere speculation without any evidence, the above argument does not hold water.
As the above argument has not been supported by any survey and statistics, the best solution to this would be rather not by decreasing the amount of work hours of the employees at quoit , it would rather be benificial if the certain surveys and feedback from the employees are conducted in order to understand the problem much better. Additionally, they might also work on improving the working conditions of the employees at the manufacturing plant as there is a high risk of on-job and industrial accidentds at such places.
In conclusion, as there has been no proper evidence supporting the above argument made by the author, it can be considered vague and flawed.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 408 350
No. of Characters: 2056 1500
No. of Different Words: 179 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.494 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.039 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.723 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 81 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 40.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.752 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.472 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.755 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.171 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 369, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...the workers at the quoit manufacturing. so in order to reduce the number of on-the...
^^
Line 3, column 401, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...s and statistics that might support the authors argument about both quoit manufacturing...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 473, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...t manufacturing and panoply industries. so as a result we cannot come to terms wit...
^^
Line 3, column 473, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[3]
Message: “so as” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...t manufacturing and panoply industries. so as a result we cannot come to terms with t...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 521, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...result we cannot come to terms with the authors hypothesis from the above lines which s...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 281, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...han the working hours of the employees. this might include various other factors lik...
^^^^
Line 5, column 463, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...n-job accidents at quoit manufacturing. so due to this indicating a mere speculati...
^^
Line 7, column 177, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he amount of work hours of the employees at quoit , it would rather be benificia...
^^
Line 7, column 187, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...of work hours of the employees at quoit , it would rather be benificial if the c...
^^
Line 7, column 198, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rs of the employees at quoit , it would rather be benificial if the certain surv...
^^
Line 7, column 292, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...back from the employees are conducted in order to understand the problem much bet...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, in conclusion, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 55.5748502994 126% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2092.0 2260.96107784 93% => OK
No of words: 408.0 441.139720559 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.12745098039 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49433085973 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80063077508 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 204.123752495 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.455882352941 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 642.6 705.55239521 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 22.8473053892 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 62.6167481019 57.8364921388 108% => OK
Chars per sentence: 149.428571429 119.503703932 125% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.1428571429 23.324526521 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.64285714286 5.70786347227 99% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.25449101796 209% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.375013016833 0.218282227539 172% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.149260569668 0.0743258471296 201% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.147726636488 0.0701772020484 211% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.204677407774 0.128457276422 159% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.154335868788 0.0628817314937 245% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.3 14.3799401198 120% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.04 48.3550499002 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.07 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.36 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 98.500998004 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.1389221557 122% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.