Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
According to the prompt, alleged decline in arctic deer population is due to obstruction imposed by melting sea ice which leads their food inaccessible to them. Prompt asserts that deer forages for food by moving over ice and now the global warming trends have caused ice to melt and because of that mobility of deer has been stymied. However, before the argument can be analysed two pieces of evidence are required to properly assess the claims made in the argument.
To begin with, it is not clear whether hunting has anything to do with the decline of deer population. Perhaps, too much hunting has caused the population of arctic deer to dwindle down and which has nothing to do with the melting of ice. Additionally, it can be the case that hunters reports are apocryphal, and they are hiding the real numbers so that they can get higher value of for the hunted deer by showing the ‘paucity’ in arctic deer population. If anyone of the above scenarios is true, then the position made in the argument that the decline is due to melting of ice doesn’t hold water.
Secondly, nothing is clear about the food source available to gaze over. It can be the case that the food source i.e. the plants these deer feed upon aren’t in abundance and most of the deer dying of exhaustion in search for food for prolonged period of time rather than by inaccessibility to reach the food source just because of obstacle imposed by melting ice. Moreover, its probable that the food source is so limited that it creates competition among the deer and various struggles and fights occur, and thus acting themselves as the reason for the population decline. If such is the case then claim made in the argument is significantly weakened.
In conclusion, the argument as it stands now, is significantly flawed due to its reliance on several unstated assumption. If the answer to above unstated assumptions is provided and perhaps a systematic study is conducted to check the validity of such evidence, then the claim that melting of ice due to global warming is the cause of decline can be properly judged.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 366 350
No. of Characters: 1692 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.374 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.623 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.497 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 122 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 88 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.154 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.488 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.692 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.383 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.593 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 414, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... value of for the hunted deer by showing the ‘paucity’ in arctic deer population....
^^
Line 6, column 245, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...ustion in search for food for prolonged period of time rather than by inaccessibility to reach...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 575, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... the reason for the population decline. If such is the case then claim made in the...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, thus, in conclusion, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1744.0 2260.96107784 77% => OK
No of words: 364.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.79120879121 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36792674256 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61217944705 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.478021978022 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 546.3 705.55239521 77% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 2.0 8.76447105788 23% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 19.7664670659 66% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 63.0431429247 57.8364921388 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.153846154 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.0 23.324526521 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.53846153846 5.70786347227 115% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.187505354245 0.218282227539 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.066280546538 0.0743258471296 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0578759996467 0.0701772020484 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.112904375496 0.128457276422 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0530501557191 0.0628817314937 84% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.3799401198 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 48.3550499002 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.8 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.41 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.