The following appeared in a letter from a firm providing investment advice for a client.
"Most homes in the northeastern United States, where winters are typically cold, have traditionally used oil as their major fuel for heating. Last heating season that region experienced 90 days with below-normal temperatures, and climate forecasters predict that this weather pattern will continue for several more years. Furthermore, many new homes are being built in the region in response to recent population growth. Because of these trends, we predict an increased demand for heating oil and recommend investment in Consolidated Industries, one of whose major business operations is the retail sale of home heating oil."
The author recommends the client to invest the Consolidated Industries because of the increased demand for heating oil. However, several assumptions in the argument need to be addressed to make the suggestion more convincing.
According to the projection from the climate forecasters, the arguer claims that cold winter will continue for several more years, Nevertheless, a supposition here is that the climate forecasters do have the ability to predict the future climate. The author does not provide readers the background information of the climate forecasters. Perhaps they could be fresh college graduates claiming that they can predict future climate by using their simple model learned from the class. Or perhaps they could be the experienced professors making a wild guess without rigorous data and mathematics in the daily afternoon tea. Therefore, we must know that they do have the qualifications in predicting climate, and they really have undertaken thorough research on the topic.
In addition, the author claims that for the purpose of keeping warm, the demand for heating oil will increase in the future. Nonetheless, using heating oil is not the only method to keep warming. It is entirely possible that there are some other important ways contributing to making people warm. For example, using modern electronic facilities can also do the same effect of keeping warming and more convenient than heating oil. Or the simplest way to make people feel not cold is putting on much more clothes than before, not using more oil. Therefore, many of these methods might lead to unnecessary to heating oil. Without ruling out all other possibilities, it is unfair to conclude that heating oil is the only way to heat.
Most important of all, the author seems to assume there are no other competitors in the market, which is definitely not true. The major business of Consolidated Industries is a retail sale, not the manufacturer or the design of the products. It is difficult for the retailer to monopolize the free market. For instance, Apple dominants the designs and manufacture of the iPhone, but there are a lot of the retailers selling iPhone in the market so as to make the profits significantly less. Therefore, the author needs to provide the competitive advantage of Consolidated Industries against others.
In conclusion, the author needs to address the assumptions as above mentioned to strengthen the argument.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not exactly
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 392 350
No. of Characters: 1997 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.45 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.094 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.812 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 153 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 115 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.507 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.295 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.532 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
The author recommends the client to inve...
^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...o make the suggestion more convincing. According to the projection from the cli...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rtaken thorough research on the topic. In addition, the author claims that for ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t heating oil is the only way to heat. Most important of all, the author seems ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 449, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
... retailers selling iPhone in the market so as to make the profits significantly less. Th...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nsolidated Industries against others. In conclusion, the author needs to addre...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, nevertheless, nonetheless, really, so, then, therefore, as to, for example, for instance, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 28.8173652695 62% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2047.0 2260.96107784 91% => OK
No of words: 392.0 441.139720559 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.22193877551 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44960558625 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8828641335 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.522959183673 0.468620217663 112% => OK
syllable_count: 644.4 705.55239521 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 39.7862727583 57.8364921388 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.35 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.6 23.324526521 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.0 5.70786347227 123% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.201010142144 0.218282227539 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0598788463662 0.0743258471296 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0497364286128 0.0701772020484 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0916199173411 0.128457276422 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0551076092855 0.0628817314937 88% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 98.500998004 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.