The following appeared in a magazine article about planning for retirement.
"Clearview should be a top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire, because it has spectacular natural beauty and a consistent climate. Another advantage is that housing costs in Clearview have fallen significantly during the past year, and taxes remain lower than those in neighboring towns. Moreover, Clearview's mayor promises many new programs to improve schools, streets, and public services. And best of all, retirees in Clearview can also expect excellent health care as they grow older, since the number of physicians in the area is far greater than the national average."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author contends that a city named Clearview is a perfect choice for retirees. He supports his contention by adding that Clearview has natural beauty, low cost of living and a great healthcare system. While the argument might seem acceptable at first glance, further inspection reveals some assumptions that require our attention.
The first assumption that is not backed by evidence is the low cost of living. The fact that housing costs have fallen during the past year does not guarantee that they are low or that they will continue falling. I would be more convinced if the author provided the actual range of these costs and an estimation about their future levels. It also strikes me that the housing costs might have fallen because people have moved out of Clearview. This would disqualify the arguer's proposition in favor of Clearview as the perfect place. Therefore, evidence regarding the reason underlying the decline in housing costs would be useful. Finally, the claim that the taxes are lower than the ones in neighboring towns, does not ensure that the taxes are actually low. It would be helpful to know the actual tax percentages to be able to evaluate if the taxes are low.
Another assumption that the author makes is that the criteria with which retirees choose their place of retirement are solely the ones that he addresses. However, retirees might value the quality of clean air in a place, the activities available, the distance from their children and grandchildren and the quality of transportation both in the city and between the city with places abroad. Thus, the author would be more convincing if he included a list of the retiree's priorities and how they are met in Clearview, as evidence to prove the city caters to all these needs.
A crucial piece of evidence has to do with the claim about the healthcare system. The memo refers to the number of physicians but fails to take into account the quality of their education, their experience and the number of medical specializations that they cover. Moreover, the number of physicians is not suggestive of their efficiency on the grounds that if the demand for physicians is greater than the supply, they will not be able to take care of all patients. A more pertinent detail would be the number of physicians per capita. This piece of information would attest to the high quality healthcare provided in Clearview.
In conclusion, the argument in the magazine article is not based on sound reasoning. The author could make a well-substantiated case if he added pieces of evidence regarding the actual costs of living, the retirees' needs and the efficiency of the healthcare system.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 449 350
No. of Characters: 2180 1500
No. of Different Words: 208 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.603 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.855 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.645 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 150 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.381 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.786 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.619 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.292 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.519 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, finally, first, however, if, moreover, regarding, so, therefore, thus, well, while, as to, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 57.0 55.5748502994 103% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2230.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 449.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.96659242762 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60321845022 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.710558292 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 212.0 204.123752495 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472160356347 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 686.7 705.55239521 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.5135971809 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.19047619 119.503703932 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.380952381 23.324526521 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.95238095238 5.70786347227 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146227275315 0.218282227539 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0457359229765 0.0743258471296 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0333121959038 0.0701772020484 47% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0790662510668 0.128457276422 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0182204494176 0.0628817314937 29% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.34 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 98.500998004 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.