The following appeared in a memo from the Board of Directors of Butler Manufacturing.
"During the past year, workers at Butler Manufacturing reported 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than workers at nearby Panoply Industries, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than ours. A recent government study reports that fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers are significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents. Therefore, we recommend that Butler Manufacturing shorten each of its work shifts by one hour. Shorter shifts will allow Butler to improve its safety record by ensuring that its employees are adequately rested."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The board of directors of Butler manufacturing are suggesting that a decrese in it's work shifts by an hour would help decrease the number of accidents being accounted for. The juxtaposition of the number of reported incidents of that of Panoply industries with it's own is the premise for this suggestion. The suggestion has multiple holes as it fails to address certain questions, questions that need to be answered for this suggestion to hold water.
Firstly, what does Panoply industries consider an accident? Does Panoply industries report all their accidents verisimutedly? There is a high possibility that Butler manufacturing has a more strict approach to safety and considers incidents Panoply industries would ignore as accidents. It is also possible that there is a fallacy in the reporting of accidents reported by Panoply industries to keep their own board of directors happy. This is a key question that must be answered before taking a decsion that might lead in decreased output of Butler Manufacturing.
Furthermore the board of diretors assume reduction in shift time would reduce on-the-job accidents. What proof if there that such a reduction would ameliorate this predicament? What goes to show that making work shifts an hour shorter would lead to a decrese in reported incidents? It is possible that the employees of Butler Manufacturing live far away from the plant and thus don't get adequate rest due to the fact they travel for miles to get home. It is also possible that a majority of the employees work a second job to make ends meet. Till the question that a redution in shift time would result in better adherence to safety measures, this suggestion cannot be considred valid.
Lastly, the conclusion that fatigue is the cause of these accidents is incoherent. What are the other siginificant factors that lead to on-the-job-accidents? There could be a lack of focus at Butler Industries which in return would open way for mistakes. There's also the possibility that these employees aren't trained properly in the use of equipments at the facility. An answer to what other factors result in in-house accidents would strengthen the suggestion else an assumption that shorter shift times would resolve the issue at hand should would fall on deaf ears.
The board of directors have proposed a suggestion that is rife with flaws. There are multiple assumptions and the questions asked above would determine if those assumptions should be considered or not. If these questions can be answered with sound reason it would the be justifiable that said suggestion should be considered.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 428 350
No. of Characters: 2150 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.548 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.023 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.806 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 116 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 68 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.455 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.992 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.455 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.302 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.517 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.082 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 306, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...own is the premise for this suggestion. The suggestion has multiple holes as it fai...
^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Furthermore,
...ed output of Butler Manufacturing. Furthermore the board of diretors assume reduction ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 379, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...g live far away from the plant and thus dont get adequate rest due to the fact they ...
^^^^
Line 13, column 256, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: There's
... in return would open way for mistakes. Theres also the possibility that these employe...
^^^^^^
Line 13, column 305, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: aren't
...so the possibility that these employees arent trained properly in the use of equipmen...
^^^^^
Line 17, column 203, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ssumptions should be considered or not. If these questions can be answered with so...
^^
Line 17, column 248, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ese questions can be answered with sound reason it would the be justifiable that ...
^^
Line 17, column 266, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...be answered with sound reason it would the be justifiable that said suggestion should...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, furthermore, if, lastly, second, so, then, thus
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 28.8173652695 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 55.5748502994 108% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2198.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 425.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 5.17176470588 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54043259262 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94792073811 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 204.123752495 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.470588235294 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 669.6 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.9492919609 57.8364921388 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.9090909091 119.503703932 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.3181818182 23.324526521 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.36363636364 5.70786347227 59% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.18927945977 0.218282227539 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0641204773985 0.0743258471296 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0461932965872 0.0701772020484 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.111652141355 0.128457276422 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0528228045514 0.0628817314937 84% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.85 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.