The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In the memo, the author has mentioned several arguments that needs to be considered and evaluated in order to construct new dormitories in the Buckingham college and these arguments are increasing enrolment, expensive off-campus housing and attracting more students using newly built dormitories.
Firstly, the argument by the author about the need for the new dormitory is stated as the increasing enrolment which will get doubled in the next 50 years. But to support this argument author has not conducted any proper survey that shows the gradual increase in the number of enrolments every year. If the author would have provided with some kind of survey it would have helped to make the argument strong.
Secondly, the argument stated by author that the off-campus housing are expensive as compared to the on-campus housing facilities will lead to the outcome for students opting for on-campus accommodation facilities. This argument cannot be taken for granted because there needs to be detailed survey about the student’s views on whether they prefer living in on-campus accommodation. Most of the students in todays world wants privacy and their own space. So, probably a survey might be a better option which can provide a strong evidence for this argument.
In the conclusion, I would just like to consider the last argument that the new dormitories will help in attracting more students to the college. This claim by the author is baseless, as any of the students opting for a college would have his foremost priority about the course which he wants to opt and how good are the professors in the college instead of looking for accommodation at the first place. So, according to me the final argument of author cannot be considered for evaluation of the situation for the construction of new dormitories.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 298 350
No. of Characters: 1493 1500
No. of Different Words: 147 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.155 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.01 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.709 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 112 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 84 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 64 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.091 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.671 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.399 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.622 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 301, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...in the number of enrolments every year. If the author would have provided with som...
^^
Line 3, column 315, Rule ID: IF_WOULD_HAVE_VBN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'had provided'?
Suggestion: had provided
...of enrolments every year. If the author would have provided with some kind of survey it would have ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, look, second, secondly, so, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 55.5748502994 79% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1529.0 2260.96107784 68% => OK
No of words: 298.0 441.139720559 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.13087248322 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15483772266 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80732125972 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.510067114094 0.468620217663 109% => OK
syllable_count: 470.7 705.55239521 67% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 19.7664670659 56% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.4966524854 57.8364921388 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.0 119.503703932 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.0909090909 23.324526521 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.45454545455 5.70786347227 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.133976653472 0.218282227539 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0554684759698 0.0743258471296 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0507201407569 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0997100572455 0.128457276422 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0570959061929 0.0628817314937 91% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.3 14.3799401198 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.3550499002 91% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.77 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.47 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 66.0 98.500998004 67% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.