The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.
"Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build one of our new stores in Plainsville, which clearly has many such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise equipment are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's schoolchildren are required to participate in a program called Fitness for Life, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In the memorandum written by the vice president of Health naturally, asserts that opening a new store in Plainsville will be profitable for the the company.His assertion is based on the previous experiences of their stores being more profitable in areas where people are with their health and states that Plainsville have such residents.However, the evidence on which the vice president is making the assumption is flawed due to two reasons.
Firstly, What are the experiences on which the company is basing the assumption of being profitable in areas where people are concerned with their health? Which people are they talking about?.Maybe, the company accounted only one or two areas where they made profits and are falsely generalizing it.Also, the kind of people buying their products may not be associated with any physical activity or belong to a particular age group.Perhaps , only old people like their products and that age group comprises the majority of the population in that area.Hence,With no information about the experience or about the people who are actually buying the products, basing their decision on such an assumtion is rather rash.
The company is assuming that Plansville citizens are active due to high sale of running shoes and exercise equipments, large number of people in local health club , weight training classed and aerobic classes.But perhaps, high sale of equipment may be due to their low prices. Also, the demographic of people going to gym and aerobics class is not metioned.Maybe, Plainsville comprises of people many of who are in the oldage and are advised by the doctors to mange their health and hence have joinde the classes.This doesn't imply that they will buy the products or an indication that new generation will also enroll.
There, due to the alternative explanation stated above to the give assumption, the argument is filled with unwarranted reason and inadequate informatio n. hence, the company shouldn't go ahead with the plan without answering the above questions and providing more information.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 11 2
No. of Sentences: 7 15
No. of Words: 341 350
No. of Characters: 1686 1500
No. of Different Words: 174 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.297 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.944 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.586 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 120 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 86 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 48.714 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 24.2 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.857 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.442 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.734 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 141, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...e in Plainsville will be profitable for the the company.His assertion is based on the p...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 141, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...e in Plainsville will be profitable for the the company.His assertion is based on the p...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 157, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: His
... will be profitable for the the company.His assertion is based on the previous expe...
^^^
Line 1, column 338, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...es that Plainsville have such residents.However, the evidence on which the vice preside...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 193, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Maybe
...h? Which people are they talking about?.Maybe, the company accounted only one or two ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 300, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Also
...profits and are falsely generalizing it.Also, the kind of people buying their produc...
^^^^
Line 3, column 357, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... people buying their products may not be associated with any physical activity or...
^^
Line 3, column 433, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Perhaps
...ity or belong to a particular age group.Perhaps , only old people like their products a...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 440, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...belong to a particular age group.Perhaps , only old people like their products and...
^^
Line 3, column 507, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ir products and that age group comprises the majority of the population in that a...
^^
Line 3, column 553, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Hence
...majority of the population in that area.Hence,With no information about the experienc...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 558, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , With
...ity of the population in that area.Hence,With no information about the experience or ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 163, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ge number of people in local health club , weight training classed and aerobic cla...
^^
Line 5, column 210, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: But
...ht training classed and aerobic classes.But perhaps, high sale of equipment may be ...
^^^
Line 5, column 358, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Maybe
... gym and aerobics class is not metioned.Maybe, Plainsville comprises of people many o...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 377, Rule ID: COMPRISES_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'comprises' or 'consists of'?
Suggestion: comprises; consists of
...lass is not metioned.Maybe, Plainsville comprises of people many of who are in the oldage an...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 514, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
...ealth and hence have joinde the classes.This doesnt imply that they will buy the pro...
^^^^
Line 5, column 519, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... and hence have joinde the classes.This doesnt imply that they will buy the products o...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 175, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: shouldn't
...equate informatio n. hence, the company shouldnt go ahead with the plan without answerin...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 224, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...go ahead with the plan without answering the above questions and providing more i...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, firstly, hence, however, may, so, kind of, talking about
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1731.0 2260.96107784 77% => OK
No of words: 329.0 441.139720559 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26139817629 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.25891501996 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96180386043 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.519756838906 0.468620217663 111% => OK
syllable_count: 540.9 705.55239521 77% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 7.0 19.7664670659 35% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 47.0 22.8473053892 206% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 153.023540939 57.8364921388 265% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 247.285714286 119.503703932 207% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 47.0 23.324526521 202% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 12.0 5.70786347227 210% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 20.0 5.25449101796 381% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.14580128782 0.218282227539 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0719713568262 0.0743258471296 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0847557368625 0.0701772020484 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0968013982415 0.128457276422 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0974583824278 0.0628817314937 155% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 26.8 14.3799401198 186% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 23.77 48.3550499002 49% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.1628742515 181% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 21.6 12.197005988 177% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.12 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.05 8.32208582834 121% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 98.500998004 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 12.3882235529 161% => OK
gunning_fog: 20.8 11.1389221557 187% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.