The following appeared as part of a letter to the editor of a scientific journal.
"A recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys provides clues as to the effects of birth order on an individual's levels of stimulation. The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence). The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring."
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument
The argument that firstborn monkeys have shown increased cortisol levels is not entirely based on proven and indisputable evidences. There is a myriad of question which is left unanswered and several assumptions have been taken for granted.
What is the total population of the rhesus monkeys across the globe? Among that quoted population, do the 18 monkeys amount for a significant portion to extrapolate the results to the entire rhesus monkeys? Also, if rhesus monkeys were found in different parts of the globe, which were the monkeys that were studied? Were the monkeys indigenous to a particular location or were they picked up from different places to sum up to 18 monkeys for the study? The study has shown a blatant disregard to such questions which engender the basis for understanding and extrapolating the results of the study.
Regarding the simulating situations, were the monkeys subjected to the same set of parameters for the study? Unless subjected to the same quantized intensity of the parameters, the study would be unable to provide conclusive results. Also, if the monkeys were subjected to the same situations, did the study ensure that only hale and vigorous monkeys were studied and that no diseased/feeble monkeys happened to be a part of the study? This is of cardinal importance when crucial comparisional inferences are supposed to be made from the study. If such assurity has not been accounted for by assuming all the monkeys of the study to be healthy enough, such an assumption could lead to erroneous derivations.
Adding further depth to the simulating parameters, were the monkeys subjected to the conditions in an external and natural habitat of theirs? Or were they subjected to the study in an isolated and easy to study environment? Has the impact of such natural and madeup environment taken into account? Not having quoted about such impacts, the study happens to assume a uniform response of the monkeys in all conditions which could plausibly be flawed.
Notwithstanding the possibility of the study being valid ultimately, such a disposition can however not be made at the current stand. The study could offer clarity to the aforementioned queries and could also make the testing parameters and procedures transparent for better comprehension and evaluation of the probity of the study.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
samples:
https://www.testbig.com/story/gre-argument-essay-topic-2-outline
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 380 350
No. of Characters: 1921 1500
No. of Different Words: 180 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.415 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.055 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.832 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.98 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.389 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.394 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.609 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.153 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, regarding, so, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.6327345309 127% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 9.0 28.8173652695 31% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1967.0 2260.96107784 87% => OK
No of words: 379.0 441.139720559 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.18997361478 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41224685777 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94080813551 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.480211081794 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 625.5 705.55239521 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.6903694172 57.8364921388 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.277777778 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0555555556 23.324526521 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.27777777778 5.70786347227 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.212139137663 0.218282227539 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0783861365233 0.0743258471296 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0528311286317 0.0701772020484 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.117909151459 0.128457276422 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0562611356121 0.0628817314937 89% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 14.3799401198 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 48.3550499002 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.82 12.5979740519 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.14 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 107.0 98.500998004 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.