The following appeared in the summary of a study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia.
"Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades, food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The following appeared in the summary of a study of headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia. Author draw conclusion that, using salicylates as a flavor additives for food, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia. There are several assumption made by author which need an specific evidences.
Firstly, author made valid point that, salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. After that author mention that many foods are naturally in salicylates, for the past several decades, food processing companies have also been adding, salicylates to food as preservatives. Author need specific evidence of result after addition of salicylates to food. Even though it's suitable for preservation but it has several disadvantage which harmful to human being. Author need to survey of current usage of salicylates in food processing companies and its quality.
Secondly, author states that the rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty year study. Author need to check survey about how many of participants reported in twenty year study. It might possibility that they have physically and mentally fit so they reported an decline in headaches problem.
Thirdly, author mention that recently food processing companies have found that salicylates can also used as flavor additives for food. With the new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia. Author need to check those who are suffering from headaches problem are really want add salicylates as flavor in food. In addition to this, if salicylates add as flavor whether it really decline in headache problem. Author need to find report showing person who add salicylates in food and really had result of decline in problem from headaches.
In conclusion, author need to check several point before making any conclusion. There are several stated and unstated assumption made by author which need specific evidences then only argument become strengthen.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 355 350
No. of Characters: 1845 1500
No. of Different Words: 149 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.341 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.197 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.719 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 153 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.722 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.199 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.399 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.607 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.155 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 300, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun assumption seems to be countable; consider using: 'several assumptions'.
Suggestion: several assumptions
...he average citizen of Mentia. There are several assumption made by author which need an specific e...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 308, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'assumptions'?
Suggestion: assumptions
...ge citizen of Mentia. There are several assumption made by author which need an specific e...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 345, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...al assumption made by author which need an specific evidences. Firstly, author ...
^^
Line 3, column 461, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun disadvantage seems to be countable; consider using: 'several disadvantages'.
Suggestion: several disadvantages
...ts suitable for preservation but it has several disadvantage which harmful to human being. Author ne...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 381, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...cally and mentally fit so they reported an decline in headaches problem. Thirdl...
^^
Line 7, column 361, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'wanted'.
Suggestion: wanted
...ering from headaches problem are really want add salicylates as flavor in food. In a...
^^^^
Line 9, column 37, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun point seems to be countable; consider using: 'several points'.
Suggestion: several points
... In conclusion, author need to check several point before making any conclusion. There are...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 119, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'assumptions'?
Suggestion: assumptions
.... There are several stated and unstated assumption made by author which need specific evid...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 213, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s then only argument become strengthen.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, really, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.6327345309 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 55.5748502994 103% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1893.0 2260.96107784 84% => OK
No of words: 355.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.3323943662 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34067318298 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79124939763 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.428169014085 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 617.4 705.55239521 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 2.0 8.76447105788 23% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.2998243235 57.8364921388 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.166666667 119.503703932 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.7222222222 23.324526521 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.05555555556 5.70786347227 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.340130897853 0.218282227539 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.126918324082 0.0743258471296 171% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.116165901107 0.0701772020484 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.189013525746 0.128457276422 147% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.12195208154 0.0628817314937 194% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 14.3799401198 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.3550499002 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.63 12.5979740519 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.74 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 98.500998004 72% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.