The following appears in a letter to the editor for the West Lansburg News:
"The tufted groundhog lives in the coastal wetlands of West Lansburg. Ancient records suggest that the tufted groundhog once numbered in the millions. Since they were declared a wildlife sanctuary in 2004, development along the coastal wetlands has been prohibited. Now local development interests are lobbying for the West Lansburg council to allow an access road to be built along the edge of wetlands. Neighboring Eastern Carpenteria, which had a similar sanctuary, has seen its sea otter population decline since the repeal of its sanctuary status in 1978. In order to preserve the region's biodiversity and ensure a healthy environment, the West Lansburg council should not allow the road to be built."
The writer of this letter to appeal against the buiding of access road along the edge of the wetlands offers an interesting argument. But to move forwars on this would require more imformation an thought. While the correlations stated are logical and probable, there may be hidden factors that we need to take into consideration.
For example, consider the statistics provided in the letter regarding the neighboring Eastern Carpenteria, where the sanctuary status was repealed in 1978. But concluding that this repeal was the cause for the decline in sea otter populatin, without any background information, is a very improper conclusion. There might have been other major factors which played for the decline in the sea otter population, such as climate changes, sea water polutions due to industry dumpage, and many more. Unless proper detailed studies hae been conducted as to what was the prominent factors which played a role in declining of sea otters, it is not possible to quote this example in this argument. Had the argument provided enough background information to prove that the decline is due to the repeal of it's sanctuary status, even then the argument would have to prove that this would be the similar case with the tufted groundhog. Sice both animanls live in extremely different habitations - one in sea water and the other in coastal wetlands; it would be ambiguous to assume that the same result should be expected in the case of tufted groundhog.
Also, considering the information provided, it is unclear of as to why the writer provided the quoted information "ancient records suggest that the tufted groundhog once numbered in the millions". It seems such that the writer of the letter wants to show that this species should be preserved by stating that this animanl was once found in large numbers. But what it doesn't provide information on is the current information in the animal - whether the animal is in the endangered list, whats its population figure, and other important statistics. It seems that he wants to gain a fake symphathy by just stating the population of the species during the ancient times. A proper study into the above-mentioned questions would reveal a more accurate analysis as to whether the devolopment of access roads would really endanger the species or not.
Lastly, the author does not consider the requirement for the access roads for West Lansburg. It might be so that the area is not developing due to the lack of accessibility with the outside world. Or the import of essential commodities such as food, medecines among others aren't readily available in time due to the same. These are major factors which needs to be addressed for any city, town or country. It might also be that building od the access roads along the "edges" of the wetlands might not endanger the tufted groundhog.
Examining all the various angles and facts involved in the letter, the argument does not justify that the building of the access roads along the coastal wetlands might endanger the tufted groundhog. While the letter does highlight a concern that should be looked into, more information is required.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 525 350
No. of Characters: 2572 1500
No. of Different Words: 239 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.787 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.899 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.59 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 189 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 138 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 92 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.439 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.292 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.519 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 194, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
... on this would require more imformation an thought. While the correlations stated ...
^^
Line 3, column 773, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...information to prove that the decline is due to the repeal of its sanctuary statu...
^^
Line 5, column 378, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...nce found in large numbers. But what it doesnt provide information on is the current i...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 497, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: what's
...r the animal is in the endangered list, whats its population figure, and other import...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 766, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...s would reveal a more accurate analysis as to whether the devolopment of access roads would r...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 274, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: aren't
...es such as food, medecines among others arent readily available in time due to the sa...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, lastly, look, may, really, regarding, so, then, while, as to, for example, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.6327345309 127% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 67.0 55.5748502994 121% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2654.0 2260.96107784 117% => OK
No of words: 523.0 441.139720559 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.07456978967 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.78217453174 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77082696792 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 247.0 204.123752495 121% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472275334608 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 815.4 705.55239521 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.67365269461 358% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.9796366246 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.380952381 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.9047619048 23.324526521 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.61904761905 5.70786347227 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.167282000524 0.218282227539 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0488293230709 0.0743258471296 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0583644369136 0.0701772020484 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0929686511416 0.128457276422 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0370552871351 0.0628817314937 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 14.3799401198 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.69 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 98.500998004 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.