The following is an excerpt from a speech given to the School Board about a change to the curriculum:
"Because the future will be dominated by technology, we must make four years of computer programming mandatory for all high school students. If our students take these classes, they’ll all be able to get high-paying programming jobs and lead fulfilling lives because software engineers and data scientists have the best job prospects and salaries. Therefore, we must educate our students so they can secure these kinds of jobs. Even if they pursue other careers, programming will still benefit them, given that all industries are becoming more technological."
As our future will be dominated by technology, it is inevitable that our education system which is archial, should focus on technology and prepare the students to work in the real world with their computer programming skills that they have learnt in their schools. Following are the notions that weaken the statement made by the School Board about the change to the curriculum.
Firstly, it is assumed that every field in this world revolves around programming. It is true that most of the fields for jobs around this world would need technology to function but it is not always true that it requires programming specifically. For example, people within the Software Industry who are Managers, Scrum Masters, Product Owners have little to no knowledge of programming and they are more highly paid than the developers who code. Not only in the software industry people working in multiple other jobs are paid higher than programmers. For instance, though unconventional, a Singer who can potentially become a pop star uses technology to make songs and can earn millions of dollars which more than what a programmer can earn in their entire life. Now a days, Social Media Influencers, Gamers earn in lumpsum amounts, so it is not always true that one should know how to code to get high paying jobs.
Secondly, not every student is interested in programming. As we know that techonology can be utilised in unenumerable ways. Such as a Graphics Designer can use multiple software tools to make a high paying job out of it and it would not require programming at all, or Music producer, who can make tunes with the use of music making software tools and would not need to code. The school board should acknowledge the fact that the students might have multiple interests even with regards to technology and provide them with classes which are not particularly about coding. So, it is not always true that software engineers and data scientists have the best job prospects and salaries.
In conclusion, we can say that even though technology plays a vital role in every aspect of our lives and that training to program in school can benefit the students in many ways. It is important for the School board to consider all the various sides of technology let alone programming, and give the opportunity to the students to explore their interests in technology and get them fulfilling jobs ecomically and also mentally satisfiable. The statement of the School Board is flawed in it's current form and would need a re-evaluation before taking any decision for the betterment of the students.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 436 350
No. of Characters: 2111 1500
No. of Different Words: 217 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.57 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.842 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.646 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 145 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 103 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 80 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.524 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.33 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.33 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 297, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...le, people within the Software Industry who are Managers, Scrum Masters, Product Owners...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 766, Rule ID: NOW_A_DAYS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'nowadays'?
Suggestion: Nowadays
...ogrammer can earn in their entire life. Now a days, Social Media Influencers, Gamers earn ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 770, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a day' or simply 'days'?
Suggestion: a day; days
...mmer can earn in their entire life. Now a days, Social Media Influencers, Gamers earn ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 58, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...y student is interested in programming. As we know that techonology can be utilise...
^^
Line 3, column 386, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'boards'.
Suggestion: boards
... and would not need to code. The school board should acknowledge the fact that the st...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 121, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'programing', 'programming'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'train' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: programing; programming
...y aspect of our lives and that training to program in school can benefit the students in m...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2149.0 2260.96107784 95% => OK
No of words: 436.0 441.139720559 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92889908257 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56953094068 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73771655829 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 213.0 204.123752495 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.488532110092 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 657.9 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.2688849587 57.8364921388 113% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.3125 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.25 23.324526521 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.125 5.70786347227 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.273488739728 0.218282227539 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0863704348095 0.0743258471296 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0707485439113 0.0701772020484 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.19095348984 0.128457276422 149% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0885921482642 0.0628817314937 141% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.3799401198 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.3550499002 109% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.197005988 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.61 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.63 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 98.500998004 103% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.