The following is an excerpt from a speech given to the School Board about a change to the curriculum:
"Because the future will be dominated by technology, we must make four years of computer programming mandatory for all high school students. If our students take these classes, they’ll all be able to get high-paying programming jobs and lead fulfilling lives because software engineers and data scientists have the best job prospects and salaries. Therefore, we must educate our students so they can secure these kinds of jobs. Even if they pursue other careers, programming will still benefit them, given that all industries are becoming more technological."
The speech provided as in the context suggests that it should be made mandatory for all the students to take four years of computer programming. The author makes this conclusion based on the point that these classes will help them get high paying programming jobs and fulfilling lives. Nonetheless, these classes are also helpful for those opting for other career options given that industries are becoming more technological. This argument can be validated completely if the author qualifies to provide justifications for certain unwarranted assumptions he has made.
First of all, the author assumes that taking the four years of computer programming course will prove sufficient for the students to get high paying jobs and lead fulfilling lives. Is this the only way of getting a high paying job? What if the student is not pertinent to this field but is proficient in some management or any other science filed. Definitely, he would excel there and hs demand will be more in those fields. Moreover, he will lead a fulfilling life in the field he wants to work in rather than the computer field which he may be in contrast with. This weakens the argument.
Again, the author is being overbearing in his claim stating that all four years of programming will be needed to fetch a software engineer's or a data scientist's job. This is not true since even in a very short time with proper guidance, a student can learn all the skills he would need to fetch these jobs. Moreover, the author has clearly not mentioned the reason why four years of this complete course is required. What if only two years of selective programming courses are sufficient for getting these software engineer and data scientist jobs? The author fails to answer this question and hence the validity of the argument is challenged.
Lastly, the author assumes that computer programming will invariably prove beneficial to a student irrespective of the career he is seeking claiming all industries are becoming technological. But will it always be true that a student will apply for any industrial job? What if he opens up a small shop or a real estate business? What if he enters the political field and performs social works. In such cases, computer programming will render him no benefits.
The argument, as it stands now, is considerably flawed. If the author is able to justify the above-stated assumptions, the validity of the given argument can be assured.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 410 350
No. of Characters: 1990 1500
No. of Different Words: 194 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.5 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.854 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.691 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 134 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 99 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.636 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.094 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.591 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.294 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.496 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.136 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 501, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this software' or 'these softwares'?
Suggestion: this software; these softwares
...ming courses are sufficient for getting these software engineer and data scientist jobs? The a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 205, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[5]
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put after the verb 'be'.
Suggestion: be always
...are becoming technological. But will it always be true that a student will apply for any ...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, if, lastly, may, moreover, nonetheless, so, in contrast, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 35.0 55.5748502994 63% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2038.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 410.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.97073170732 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49982852243 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75330745888 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.482926829268 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 613.8 705.55239521 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.5071263678 57.8364921388 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.6363636364 119.503703932 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.6363636364 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.27272727273 5.70786347227 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235222651133 0.218282227539 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0749976808395 0.0743258471296 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0714071583089 0.0701772020484 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.140709105336 0.128457276422 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0554144469674 0.0628817314937 88% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 14.3799401198 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 98.500998004 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.