The following letter is from a group of Linford College alumni to the chair of the art department at the college.
"In a recent survey of college graduates, 90 percent agreed that participating in an internship increased their chances of finding a job after graduation, but last year, only 40 percent of Linford’s graduating art students had completed an internship. Skyway Designs, located in nearby Linford City, is the perfect company for students to intern with for a number of reasons: They offer internships in all of their departments, so every student is sure to find work that they are interested in. Additionally, their internships offer flexible working hours. Finally, Skyway Designs is known for being one of the best in the design business, as over 80 percent of businesses in Linford City have used the services of Skyway Designs for their design needs. Given the vital role that work experience plays in a student’s success after graduation, we recommend that our art department require all art students to complete an internship with Skyway Designs before graduation."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The prompt suggests the idea of the group of Linford College alumni to require students to complete an internship with Skyway Design before graduation for certain reasons. Although the letter has been provided with ample of reasons, many of those are inflicted with flawed assumptions. These premises are to be mentioned here followed by necesary clarifications.
First of all, the letter believes that - the other 60% students who did not do an intership with the Skyway Designs had not been provided with good jobs. But what if the speculation is not proper? It can be the case that all of those students had been offered with some great jobs even though they had not done the intership with Skyway Design. It can also be the case that those studetns might have done intership with better art and design company than Skyway Design and so might have landed better jobs than the other 40% students. Although, none of these are mentioned in the prompt, it does not preclude the possibilites also. Nowhere in the prompt it is said that - the other 60% students did not get jobs of their worth or they got lower reputated ones compared to the 40% students who had done internship with the Skyway Design. So, there is a lack of information adn reasoning in the prompt and so it makes the conclusion of the letter to be somewhat skeptical.
Second conjecture by the letter to be pointed out is that - the quality of the Skyway Design is still the same as it was before the "recent survey". Moreover, the prompt did not mention the exact timingof conducting the survey - as "recent" might imply five years or seven years or two years from present or so on. Nevertheless, two years or five years are more than enough time for a company to detoriate. It might be the case that the Skyway Design might have losen their demand in design works becasue of their non-professionalism in recent years. Or they might have losen the demand because of the arrival of a new and more equipped and sophisticated design company. Because of these the company might not provide its intern with that much possibility of jobs after graduation as it had been providing in the past. As a result, it might not be a great idea to continue with Skyway Design only based on their earlier reputation for good works and without properly navigating there current situation and demand in the market; requiring greater evidences and information. If any of the possiblites are proved to be true then it will make the argument of the letter to choose Skyway Design to be a faulty one.
Third of all the premises the letter had conveyed is that - the Skyway Design covers all the departments of design also with ample capacity for each of the department. What if the company does have the varities in departments but does not have enough capacity for a larger amount of students of the same department. For example - if the company has A,B,C departments and the majority of the students of the mentioned college have proclivity towards the A department then what is the guarantee that the Skyway Design can include all of those students in the same A department? It could be the case that the each department of Skyway Design has only 20 students to accomodate and the number of students to join only department A is 50. As a result the company might not able to accomodate all of those students into theri respective fields, making them to choose other fields or not join them. However, any evidence reagrding the capacity of the company has been mentioned in the prompt and so makes the interpretation wide open to be skeptic. If the incapacity of the company is proved to be true then it will and surely hamper the arguments of letter recommending most of the students to do internship in Skyway Design.
So, looking at all the points and factors aforementioned, it can be safely stated that - more related evidences and proper reasoning are needed to come to a concrete conclusion as most of the assumptions underlie the letter have been devoid of critical reasoning and blighted with flawed reasoning, resulting in a faulty conclusion.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 18 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 715 350
No. of Characters: 3320 1500
No. of Different Words: 260 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.171 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.643 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.583 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 239 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 150 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 110 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.684 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.654 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.328 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.501 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 627, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
..., it does not preclude the possibilites also. Nowhere in the prompt it is said that ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1094, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ring greater evidences and information. If any of the possiblites are proved to be...
^^
Line 7, column 351, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , B
...ment. For example - if the company has A,B,C departments and the majority of the s...
^^
Line 7, column 450, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'A' is left.
Suggestion: the; A
...ntioned college have proclivity towards the A department then what is the guarantee t...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, look, moreover, nevertheless, second, so, still, then, third, for example, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 35.0 19.6327345309 178% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 11.1786427146 215% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 28.8173652695 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 93.0 55.5748502994 167% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3413.0 2260.96107784 151% => OK
No of words: 713.0 441.139720559 162% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.78681626928 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.16740358842 4.56307096286 113% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7176800967 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 271.0 204.123752495 133% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.380084151473 0.468620217663 81% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1066.5 705.55239521 151% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.9561786098 57.8364921388 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.269230769 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.4230769231 23.324526521 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.03846153846 5.70786347227 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.113092731417 0.218282227539 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0360765178549 0.0743258471296 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0434399199375 0.0701772020484 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0758104596481 0.128457276422 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0468438418969 0.0628817314937 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 14.3799401198 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.3550499002 109% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.197005988 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.8 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.08 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 140.0 98.500998004 142% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.