The following recommendation appeared in a memo from the mayor of the town of Hopewell.
"Two years ago, the nearby town of Ocean View built a new municipal golf course and resort hotel. During the past two years, tourism in Ocean View has increased, new businesses have opened there, and Ocean View's tax revenues have risen by 30 percent. Therefore, the best way to improve Hopewell's economy—and generate additional tax revenues—is to build a golf course and resort hotel similar to those in Ocean View."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The mayor of the town of hopewell argues that the best way to energize hopewell's economy is to build a golf course and resort hotel similar to those in ocean view. To buttress the conclusion, the author cites the following evidences: ocean view's golf course and report hotel play significant role in promoting local tax revenue by 30 percent. Therefore, by mimicking its action, hopewell is able to enhance economy condition. Though the issue has merit, due to lack of convincing evidences and unstated assumptions, the suggestion made in the memo is unsubstantiated.
To begin with, the rising tax revenue in ocean view does not necessarily come from golf course and resort hotel mainly. we are not given the details about how exactly those affect the economic in ocean view. other impetus driven the income is unexamined. For example, there is a promising technology company that produces the most innovative products worldwide recently. thus, this company is able to receive considerable profits from consumers and pay more tax. Another bedrock for economic growth might be high quality education. it is possible that ocean view has one of the most pretigious university in the world, thereby owning outstanding ungraduates. No one can deny that knowledge is able to create treasure, since with wider knowledge base and advanced skills, people can have novel ideas and improved efficiency, so that local companies are able to generate more wealth. The author also fails to provide the exact number of improvement of tax revenue. what if the original revenue is very small? In this case, 30 percent change does not reflect the advantage of newly built resort.
Moreover, ocean view and hopewell might not be comparable because of different characteristics. what are the population, location, GDP par capital, and tourist attractions in those two towns respectively? The mode of ocean view might not be applicable to hopewell. it is likely that ocean view is famous for its beautiful sences and pleasant climate, and people are willing to spend vacation on it. On the other hand, hopewell does not have any attracting sights and temperatures are in general low, thus preventing potential visitors to come. following this way, resort hotel perhaps does not large customers and golf courses will have multiple vacanies. Furthermore, there is no guarantee that golf course and resort hotel would still be popular in the foreseeable future. people might be drawn attention to other activities, such as horse riding and hiking. Insistently copy and paste from ocean view probably would not be suitable in hopewell.
Last but not least, the author unfairly assumes that constructing a golf course and resort hotel is the best way to improve economy. we know that economy health depends on various factors, including business operations, personal incomes, tax revenues and so one. there is no singly measurement to determine the condition of local economics, and of course, it is invalid to advocate the "best" way. there are many other approach leading to stronger economic entity. For instance, the government can grant subsidy to local business and so that companies can hire more skilled employees and utilize more sophisticated equipment. The output and business revenue are more likely to enhance and so the tax revenue.
To sum up, as it stands, the conclusion in the memo is relied on several questionable assumptions that curtail the credibility of the recommendation. To further strengthen the argument, the director is advised to add the evidences as follows: first, how golf course and resort hotel actually contibutes to ocean view; second, whether the same is also applicable to ocean view; third, whether golf course and resort hotel are the most crucial cause for economic growth.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
also need to mention it is 'Two years ago, '
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 613 350
No. of Characters: 3102 1500
No. of Different Words: 298 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.976 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.06 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.646 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 230 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 175 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 118 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 74 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 30.65 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.347 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.65 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.314 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.523 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 121, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...om golf course and resort hotel mainly. we are not given the details about how exa...
^^
Line 3, column 209, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Other
...hose affect the economic in ocean view. other impetus driven the income is unexamined...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 372, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Thus
...innovative products worldwide recently. thus, this company is able to receive consid...
^^^^
Line 3, column 533, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...growth might be high quality education. it is possible that ocean view has one of ...
^^
Line 3, column 964, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: What
...t number of improvement of tax revenue. what if the original revenue is very small? ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 97, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: What
...e because of different characteristics. what are the population, location, GDP par c...
^^^^
Line 5, column 266, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ew might not be applicable to hopewell. it is likely that ocean view is famous for...
^^
Line 5, column 545, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Following
... preventing potential visitors to come. following this way, resort hotel perhaps does not...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 776, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: People
...l be popular in the foreseeable future. people might be drawn attention to other activ...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 134, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...tel is the best way to improve economy. we know that economy health depends on var...
^^
Line 9, column 252, Rule ID: AND_SO_ONE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'and so on' (="etc.")?
Suggestion: and so on
...rations, personal incomes, tax revenues and so one. there is no singly measurement to dete...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 264, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...sonal incomes, tax revenues and so one. there is no singly measurement to determine t...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 409, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...d to advocate the 'best' way. there are many other approach leading to stro...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, furthermore, if, may, moreover, second, so, still, then, therefore, third, thus, well, for example, for instance, in general, of course, such as, to begin with, to sum up, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 26.0 11.1786427146 233% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 55.5748502994 115% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3204.0 2260.96107784 142% => OK
No of words: 613.0 441.139720559 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.22675367047 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.97582523872 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77952748049 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 314.0 204.123752495 154% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.512234910277 0.468620217663 109% => OK
syllable_count: 1026.0 705.55239521 145% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 19.7664670659 162% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 53.2562257951 57.8364921388 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.125 119.503703932 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.15625 23.324526521 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.78125 5.70786347227 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 8.20758483034 207% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.295577300417 0.218282227539 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0691077054068 0.0743258471296 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0805361108247 0.0701772020484 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.171965618898 0.128457276422 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0804925801242 0.0628817314937 128% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.3550499002 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.75 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 162.0 98.500998004 164% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.