The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
Monarch books board of directors have recommended that monarch books should open a café in its store as it will attract more customers and will help monarch book to better compete with regal books which has recently opened its own café. The recommendation is based on the action taken by regal book. However, before this recommendation can be properly evaluated and confirmed that it will have predicted result three questions must be answered.
First of all, will attracting more customers reflect on more books sale? In other words, will monarch book store be able to increase it's book sales if more customers visit the store? What if customers only come to the store to have a coffee and a cookie at the café and are not interested in buying any book? It is possible that customer might come to the café pick a book and read it till the time s/he is having coffee and then leave without purchasing a book. Answers to the above questions will determine if the recommendation will fetch the expected results or not. If any of these scenario listed as question holds good then the recommendation by board of directors will not work.
Secondly, it is recommended that monarch book replace the kids book section with café and assumes that demand for kid books will decrease in coming future. One need to understand if a similar arrangement has been done by regal book. Did regal book also replaced the kid book section with Café? If regal book has not done that and regal book still continues to sell kid books then monarch book will not be able to compete with regal book in kid book sales. Even though it is mentioned that percentage of population of kid under 10 is declining it doesn't necessarily mean that kid books will not be sold and as recommendation is to replace the kid section with café monarch will loose on selling kid books. In case any of the scenario has merits, then conclusion drawn in the original argument is significantly weakened.
Lastly, are monarch book shop and regal book shop the same? What has worked for regal would work for monarch? What if regal's café is doing good business in café sales but café business has no impact on the book sales. What if regal has a free parking and monarch does not have free parking and customers have to park their vehicle at a paid parking charging by the minute. It is important to understand answers to the questions listed above to evaluate if the board of director recommendation will show expected result or not.
Stated in this way the recommendation fails to mention several key factors on the basis of which it could be evaluated. The conclusion relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Therefore, the recommendation is rather weak, unconvincing, and has several flaws.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 484 350
No. of Characters: 2243 1500
No. of Different Words: 205 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.69 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.634 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.574 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 129 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 103 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 67 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.043 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.576 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.739 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.326 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.524 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.109 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 20, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'attract'
Suggestion: attract
...t be answered. First of all, will attracting more customers reflect on more books sa...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 582, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this scenario' or 'these scenarios'?
Suggestion: this scenario; these scenarios
... the expected results or not. If any of these scenario listed as question holds good then the ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 547, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ulation of kid under 10 is declining it doesnt necessarily mean that kid books will no...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 678, Rule ID: LOOSE_LOSE[4]
Message: Did you mean 'lose' (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
Suggestion: lose
... the kid section with café monarch will loose on selling kid books. In case any of th...
^^^^^
Line 13, column 219, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...siness has no impact on the book sales. What if regal has a free parking and monarch...
^^^^
Line 13, column 294, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d monarch does not have free parking and customers have to park their vehicle at ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, lastly, second, secondly, so, still, then, therefore, first of all, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2311.0 2260.96107784 102% => OK
No of words: 482.0 441.139720559 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79460580913 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68556276237 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60189136468 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.427385892116 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 700.2 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.7035317796 57.8364921388 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.47826087 119.503703932 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.9565217391 23.324526521 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.91304347826 5.70786347227 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.362136742467 0.218282227539 166% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.119688476166 0.0743258471296 161% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0862400182577 0.0701772020484 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.230599529312 0.128457276422 180% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104464852037 0.0628817314937 166% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 12.5979740519 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.25 8.32208582834 87% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.