The following was written by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.
"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. At present, the nearest jazz club is over 60 miles away from Monroe; thus, our proposed club, the C Note, would have the local market all to itself. In addition, there is ample evidence of the popularity of jazz in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's jazz festival last summer, several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe, and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly.' Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment. We therefore predict that the C Note cannot help but make money."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The author suggests that the C note in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. However, several following assumptions need to be addressed.
The first assumption is that the nearest jazz club is over 60 miles away from Monroe, so the C Note would have the local market all to itself. However, it is likely that the rent in the downtown of Monroe is really expensive, and it might cost 10000 dollars per month. Thus, other music clubs decided to operate their clubs in farther sites to save the costs, and they could use this money to improve their quality of performance. Moreover, the author must tell us how many people will be willing to come to this jazz club. If there are only a few jazz fans being willing to go to the C note, then this club may not be able to earn a huge amount of money. Therefore, the author must provide us with a more detailed analysis about how much cost they will need to spend and how many people will be their potential audiences.
The author assumes that there is ample evidence of the popularity of jazz in Monroe. Nevertheless, it is possible that most of the people attending Monroe’s jazz festival last summer will only participate in this kind of musical activities once per year. Because they are busy in their works, it will be highly possible that they do not have spare time in the rest of the year. Thus, these people may not choose to go to the jazz clubs to attend other jazz activities. Moreover, it is also likely that these well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe because of the lower living costs and more comfortable climate in this region. These musicians may work in other cities instead of Monroe because other cities have more working opportunities for them. It is also likely that a few jazz clubs in other cities will pay a higher salaries for them, so they will choose to work in other cities and live in Monroe. Therefore, the author must tell if there are really lots of musical activities existing in Monroe.
The author assumes that the typical jazz fan spends close to 1000 dollars per year on jazz entertainment. However, it is likely that this nation will encounter a serious economic recession in the future, so these jazz fans will not be able to spend as much money as they spent before. Furthermore, it is also possible that there will be other new types of music arise, such as rock music and pop music, so these jazz fans will choose to listen to other types of music. Therefore, the audiences of jazz music may decline in the future because these jazz fans are tired of listening jazz music. As a result, the author must to provide more comprehensive analysis about if these fans will still choose to listen to jazz music in the future.
This jazz club may somewhat earn more money in Monroe. However, the author still has to address the assumptions above to strengthen the argument.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 513 350
No. of Characters: 2308 1500
No. of Different Words: 201 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.759 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.499 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.278 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 85 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 53 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.304 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.357 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.826 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.34 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.529 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.134 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 545, Rule ID: MANY_NN_U[6]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun jazz seems to be uncountable; consider using: 'little jazz'.
Suggestion: little jazz
... to this jazz club. If there are only a few jazz fans being willing to go to the C note,...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 618, Rule ID: MUST_HAVE_TO[1]
Message: After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use 'must' or 'have to' here.
Suggestion: must; have to
...ing jazz music. As a result, the author must to provide more comprehensive analysis abo...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, nevertheless, really, so, still, then, therefore, thus, well, as to, kind of, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 27.0 12.9520958084 208% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 28.8173652695 167% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 65.0 55.5748502994 117% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2374.0 2260.96107784 105% => OK
No of words: 513.0 441.139720559 116% => OK
Chars per words: 4.62768031189 5.12650576532 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75914943092 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.38981425781 2.78398813304 86% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.40350877193 0.468620217663 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 748.8 705.55239521 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.5337454385 57.8364921388 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.217391304 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3043478261 23.324526521 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.60869565217 5.70786347227 116% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.295963960274 0.218282227539 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.103186567713 0.0743258471296 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.077070861836 0.0701772020484 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.18704041495 0.128457276422 146% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0668811441106 0.0628817314937 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.87 12.5979740519 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.1 8.32208582834 85% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 98.500998004 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.