“Last year, the number of visits to our local beach in Bridge Bay was 50 percent lower
than the year before. Early last year we ended our contract with Arko Trash Collection, a
company that had serviced local garbage collection for the past twenty years. We switched
at that time to Satellite Waste Corporation, another trash collection company. In nearby
Ocean Harbor, where Arko has continued to provide garbage collection, the beaches are
experiencing record levels of attendance. Meanwhile, in Bridge Bay, complaints about
garbage on our beach have increased this year. Clearly, inadequate garbage collection on
our beach by Satellite has led to the significant drop in visitors. Therefore, in order to
restore visitor numbers to our local beach, we recommend resuming our contract with
Arko as soon as possible.”
The author of the argument claims that in order to restore visitor numbers to our local bbeach, we recommend resuming our contract with arko as soon as possible. To buttress his argument, the author cites the following evideces: first, the nearby ocean harbor who uses arko has experienced greater attendance than us who uses satellite waste corporation; second, Bright bay recievesncreasing complaints about the garbage on our beach this year; third, inadequate garbage collection on our beach by satellite has led to significant drop in visitors.
To begin with, the author fails to provide the comparison between bridge bay and ocean harbor, which circumventing our information to draw the conclusion. if ocean harbor has more favorable shopping stores and beautifual views, while bridge bay does not, then it is reasonable that more visitors will be attracted to ocean harbor. In addition, it is plausible that ocean Harbr become free to all visitors whereas individuals are still charged a lot by bridge bay, then one main reason preventing people from visiting our bay might fall within the higher cost. Therefore, unless the author inform us all the differencesbetween these two places, we cannot simply attribute reducing number of visitors to garbage collection.
Moreover, we are not informed about all the varied characteristics between satellite waste corporation and arko. In all likelihood, using arko is not affordable to us, so that high expenditure on garbage collection deter us from resuming our contract with arko. even though we now draw less visitors, we might earn higher profits. there is also no guarantee that we can successfully restore visitors to our local beach to our local beach. if local people are no longer interested in visiting beach but instead prefer going to mesuems, and our local beach is too far and too inconvenient for other visitors to come, then the total amount of visitors will remain the same even if we resume our contract with arko. With underlying reasons behind recent trend provided by the author, we are unable to fully evaluate this argument and predict the future trend precisely.
Last but not least, the author should offer more details about the complaints mentioned about. it is plausible that the increase in complaints is very small, so that cannot represent the opionions from the general public. Or most of the complaints are from same people who cannot endure with the current garbage. However, this garbage can still be acceptable by most people. To better evaluate the argument, we should also be provided about the content of those complaints. What do this complaints indicate? are they all about the inadequate garbage collection. In all likelihood, if the complaints are about the improper behaviors about the visitors who drop the garbage everywhere, then the change of garbage collection company might not alleviating this issue.
To sum up, the conclusion about the argument is relied on incomplete evidences that weaken the validity of the argument. To further strengthen the conclusion, the author is adivsed to add the evidences as follows: first, whether there are major differences between ocean harbor and our bridge bay in many other respects; second, whether the complaints are all about inadequate garbage collection due to switch of companies; finally, whether more visitors will be again attracted to our bay after resuming our contract with arko.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 552 350
No. of Characters: 2819 1500
No. of Different Words: 242 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.847 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.107 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.697 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 211 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 151 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 112 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 70 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 32.471 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 20.782 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.765 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.369 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.589 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.224 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 156, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...our information to draw the conclusion. if ocean harbor has more favorable shoppin...
^^
Line 5, column 263, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Even
...s from resuming our contract with arko. even though we now draw less visitors, we mi...
^^^^
Line 5, column 287, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun visitors is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...ract with arko. even though we now draw less visitors, we might earn higher profits....
^^^^
Line 5, column 332, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...visitors, we might earn higher profits. there is also no guarantee that we can succes...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 440, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
... to our local beach to our local beach. if local people are no longer interested i...
^^
Line 7, column 96, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...s about the complaints mentioned about. it is plausible that the increase in compl...
^^
Line 7, column 207, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...cannot represent the opionions from the general public. Or most of the complaints are from sam...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 483, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...he content of those complaints. What do this complaints indicate? are they all about...
^^^^
Line 7, column 509, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Are
...ints. What do this complaints indicate? are they all about the inadequate garbage c...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, moreover, second, so, still, then, therefore, third, whereas, while, in addition, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 28.8173652695 163% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2896.0 2260.96107784 128% => OK
No of words: 552.0 441.139720559 125% => OK
Chars per words: 5.24637681159 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84713113593 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77239738324 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 259.0 204.123752495 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.469202898551 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 900.9 705.55239521 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 94.7800847373 57.8364921388 164% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.636363636 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.0909090909 23.324526521 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.63636363636 5.70786347227 116% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 13.0 6.88822355289 189% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.271095463906 0.218282227539 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0779921304407 0.0743258471296 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0705483771879 0.0701772020484 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.160667868693 0.128457276422 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0758171284413 0.0628817314937 121% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 14.3799401198 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.3550499002 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 122.0 98.500998004 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.