Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
It is stated in the passage that a certain ballet school is the clear choice among the dance schools in Elmtown and provides some justification to this claim. While the evidences seem convincing but they are few things that are left uncertain, like the percentage of students who became professional dancers, the alumni from their school and their experiences, the other dance schools stated in the passage etc.
The first question which is the number of students out of the total batch that have become professionals. This is significant because if there are few students who became professional dancers, it implies that the success rate of the school is pretty low since the number of students that could not meet the cut will be in majority then, which in turn indicates that the school does not provide enough nourishment to students.
The second one, is relevant here because if the successful students had prior learning experiences and joined the school just to get a closure for their training then the school might not be the sole reason for their success. It could be the previous institutes or the training that made them successful.
The next significant point is whether the other dance schools mentioned are all just ballet schools or
do they programs for other dance forms as well. If all these dance schools teach different or multiple forms of dance then the comparison seems irrelevant in this case.
Hence, the above mentioned points need to answered in order to evaluate the recommendation given in the passage.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 257 350
No. of Characters: 1256 1500
No. of Different Words: 136 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.004 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.887 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.549 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 85 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 61 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.7 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.828 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.378 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.795 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.14 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 300, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tage of students who became professional dancers, the alumni from their school a...
^^
Line 1, column 326, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e professional dancers, the alumni from their school and their experiences, the ...
^^
Line 7, column 103, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mentioned are all just ballet schools or do they programs for other dance forms a...
^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Do
...ioned are all just ballet schools or do they programs for other dance forms as ...
^^
Line 9, column 9, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[2]
Message: The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'program'
Suggestion: program
...e all just ballet schools or do they programs for other dance forms as well. If all t...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, if, second, so, then, well, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 24.0 55.5748502994 43% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 4.0 16.3942115768 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1286.0 2260.96107784 57% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 257.0 441.139720559 58% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.00389105058 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.00390054096 4.56307096286 88% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60591765511 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 138.0 204.123752495 68% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.536964980545 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 378.0 705.55239521 54% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 19.7664670659 46% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 75.4718490565 57.8364921388 130% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.888888889 119.503703932 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.5555555556 23.324526521 122% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.77777777778 5.70786347227 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 6.88822355289 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.270185217997 0.218282227539 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112339412721 0.0743258471296 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0874012819714 0.0701772020484 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.1375359103 0.128457276422 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0851650437783 0.0628817314937 135% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.4 14.3799401198 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 48.3550499002 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.02 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 47.0 98.500998004 48% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.