Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author claims here that, Pirouettes Ballet School is the best dance school as they provide the most intense program along with some teachers who were very good dancers. Stated in this way, the argument fails to mention some important factors, on the basis of which it could have been evaluated. To support his claim, he reasons that, many of their students over the past years have become professional dancers with top companies. However, careful scrutiny of evidence reveals that there is little credible support to author's claim. Hence, it can be considered that the argument is incomplete and unsustainable.
Firstly the author readily assumes that, as the teachers were very good dancers in during their time and have danced in the prestigious companies, then they must be also be very good dance teacher. This is merely an assumption without much solid ground. To illustrate, there are many cases where a scholar who always topped his class fails to teach the easiest of things. It is not necessary that a good student or performer will be a good teacher. Hence, it would have been much more convincing if the author explicitly stated that, the teachers are experienced int teaching and they have proved to be effective very to the students.
Again, the author points out that their past students have gone to the most prestigious dance companies. This is again a weak and unsupported claim as it does not demonstrate any clear correlation between the success rate and enrollment rates. For example, there can be alumni of 1,000 students and successful student can be 800 where as in another case, the aluni can be 10,000 with the same number if successful students. But the number would still say that 800 is many. So, if the author provided evidence that the school has very good success rate it would have been convincing.
Finally, the conclusion the author has drawn raises some skeptical questions. Does intense program help to leran a cheerful thing like dance? What was the percentile of success rate of other schools? Are there other schools with more experienced teachers?
Without answering these questions, the reader is left with the impression that the claim here is just a wishful thinking of the author rather than substantive evidence.
In conclusion, the argument is unpersuasive as it stands. To bolster further, the author must have provided evidence with help of statistical data of all the dance schools of the Elmtown. Without any rigid reasoning, the argument can be considered as weak.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 420 350
No. of Characters: 2052 1500
No. of Different Words: 204 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.527 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.886 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.474 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 142 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 108 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.261 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.066 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.391 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.283 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.515 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.051 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 330, Rule ID: WHERE_AS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'whereas'?
Suggestion: whereas
...dents and successful student can be 800 where as in another case, the aluni can be 10,00...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, hence, however, if, so, still, then, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2122.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 420.0 441.139720559 95% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05238095238 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52701905584 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56484496709 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497619047619 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 632.7 705.55239521 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.6099529357 57.8364921388 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.2608695652 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2608695652 23.324526521 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.30434782609 5.70786347227 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.254948168724 0.218282227539 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0675938080443 0.0743258471296 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0746346110838 0.0701772020484 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125579765202 0.128457276422 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0631668841447 0.0628817314937 100% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.01 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 98.500998004 95% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.