A recent survey of 250 adults between the ages of 30 and 45 showed an association between the number of hours adults spend online each day and self-reporting of symptoms commonly associated with depression. The survey found that adults who spend 30 hours or more online each week were twice as likely as others to report that they “frequently” had trouble concentrating. Of adults who reported spending more than 30 hours per week online, 20 percent also reported that they had felt “sad, down, or blue” at least three times within the past month.
These results suggest that spending too much time online is linked to depression and people who want to improve their well-being should strictly limit the time they spend online.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The argument presented here states about a survey in which 250 adults are observed for their number of hours spent online and its effects on their psychology. The author of the statement has provided us with some numbers related to the survey with the help of which a conclusion is drawn that people who spend more time online are much likely to suffer depression. Thus, author makes a general recommendation that if individuals want to improve their health, they should strictly limit their time spent online. Author of this claim has made some assumptions while coming to the conclusion, these assumptions should be thoroughly analyzed in order to come to a solid conclusion.
At first, a recent survey is used as a base to start an argument. The information provided about this survey is limited, for example, it states 250 adults between ages 30 and 45 were included in the survey. It does not state, why people from this age group are considered for the particular survey. Also, it does not give us any information about background of these people, for example, are they male, female, working or non working? Nowadays, one's profession is one of the most important reasons for her to feel depressed. Hence, if author would have mentioned details of the group of people considered for survey, it would have helped to make the argument a little more clear.
Furthermore, while stating the findings of the survey, it is mentioned that adults who spend more than 30 hours online each week, reported that they frequently have trouble concentrating. This number of people is twice with respect to the people who spend less time online each week. Again, we do not have clear idea of the duration of the survey conducted. If it was for the duration of one or two weeks, the conclusion drawn can not be reliable. Also, these people say that they frequently had problems concentrating, how frequently? is not answered here. The frequency could be twice a month or twice a week. To consider this evidence reliable in order to come near to conclusion, all the above mentioned data should be available.
Additionally, the 20 percent adults who have reported they felt "sad,down or blue", are said to have reported this during last one month. As we do not know the survey about which we are discussing is conducted during this month, few weeks before this month or a couple of months before last month. If it was conducted six months ago, and these 20 % people are complaining now, it can not be firmly stated that this effect is because of their being online for longer hours. The author needs to provide more precise information about this assumption.
It can be clearly said from above discussion, to say that the result of the survey indicates, spending too munch time online is linked to depression, the details related to the particular survey needs to be elaborated more
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 493 350
No. of Characters: 2315 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.712 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.696 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.48 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.409 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.691 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.299 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.5 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rder to come to a solid conclusion. At first, a recent survey is used as a b...
^^
Line 3, column 448, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...male, working or non working? Nowadays, ones profession is one of the most important...
^^^^
Line 3, column 545, Rule ID: IF_WOULD_HAVE_VBN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'had mentioned'?
Suggestion: had mentioned
...her to feel depressed. Hence, if author would have mentioned details of the group of people consider...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ke the argument a little more clear. Furthermore, while stating the findings ...
^^
Line 5, column 539, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...problems concentrating, how frequently? is not answered here. The frequency could ...
^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... mentioned data should be available. Additionally, the 20 percent adults who ...
^^
Line 7, column 76, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , down
...ts who have reported they felt 'sad,down or blue', are said to have reporte...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e information about this assumption. It can be clearly said from above discus...
^^
Line 9, column 106, Rule ID: TOO_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'to munch'?
Suggestion: to munch
...esult of the survey indicates, spending too munch time online is linked to depression, th...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, furthermore, hence, if, so, thus, while, as for, for example, with respect to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 28.8173652695 163% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2397.0 2260.96107784 106% => OK
No of words: 492.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 4.87195121951 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70967865282 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64524818974 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 229.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.465447154472 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 738.0 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 4.96107784431 242% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.6123187109 57.8364921388 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.217391304 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3913043478 23.324526521 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.91304347826 5.70786347227 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.232330925097 0.218282227539 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0685443817332 0.0743258471296 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0905718372215 0.0701772020484 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.133484577115 0.128457276422 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0429584820358 0.0628817314937 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.3799401198 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.97 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.82 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.