Several charitable organizations in Pleasantville provide opportunities for teenagers to engage in community service. These organizations have a great need for volunteers, but in recent years, the number of teenage volunteers has significantly declined.
The Pleasantville School Board should take measures to increase the number of volunteers. Teachers, parents, and other community members agree that it is important for young people to learn the value of community service. Requiring high school students to engage in community service would provide much-needed assistance to worthy local charities and would also help young people understand the importance of giving back to their community. For this reason, the Pleasantville School Board should institute a program requiring students of Pleasantville High School to complete 40 hours of community service prior to graduation.
The author is trying to convey about the decline in number of teenage volunteers declining. The Pleasantville High School wants the students to learn more about community service and giving to others. Thus the Pleasantville School Board has come up with a rule that requires a student to complete 40 hours of community service prior to graduation and is mandatory. This overall portrays a sense of proper child grooming steps which should be taken by a school but, the rule made for it is invalid or could be termed as harsh for some individuals.
The rule creates a negative impact upon the student as it is forcing them to do things against there will. It is a proven theory by psychologists that a person who is told to refrain himself from a doing specific task has an increased urge to do that task. Hence, it is advised to regulate stuff at a good note like, school can provide benefits to those students who have completed a certain hours of community services. The person completing the service could also been awarded through increasing his/her grades.
Also, the volunteers who participate will be given more recognition and will be appreciated through the school during ceremonies. This indirectly creates a sense of gratitude amongst the students which will lead to increase in students taking part in volunteering. So after feeling related to the program more students who had already taken part in the progrm would encourage other students who were not considering to take part in it.
Moreover, the school body should conduct a seminar for the parent to explain them in encouraging the students in taking part in service. The seminar should include the benefits so that while at home the parents can talk out similar stuff to their children. This coming from the parents about the service will denote that it is beneficial, and he/she would consider joining. Also, the students can independently discuss the reasons of not joining.
To conclude, the Pleasantville School Board should survey the reason as to why the students are not willing to join. It might be that it is due to the cumbersome homework and assignments given to them or any event is nearby on the very date.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 375 350
No. of Characters: 1786 1500
No. of Different Words: 198 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.401 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.763 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.614 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 133 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.059 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.044 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.317 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.566 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.146 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 62, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...to convey about the decline in number of teenage volunteers declining. The Pleasa...
^^
Line 1, column 203, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...community service and giving to others. Thus the Pleasantville School Board has come...
^^^^
Line 3, column 393, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'hour'?
Suggestion: hour
...e students who have completed a certain hours of community services. The person compl...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 266, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[3]
Message: “So after” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...n students taking part in volunteering. So after feeling related to the program more stu...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 405, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[3]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'considering taking'.
Suggestion: considering taking
...d encourage other students who were not considering to take part in it. Moreover, the school body...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, moreover, so, thus, while, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 28.8173652695 94% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 55.5748502994 103% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 16.3942115768 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1828.0 2260.96107784 81% => OK
No of words: 373.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90080428954 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39467950092 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67184238743 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 204.123752495 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.522788203753 0.468620217663 112% => OK
syllable_count: 558.9 705.55239521 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 29.2654005238 57.8364921388 51% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 107.529411765 119.503703932 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.9411764706 23.324526521 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.17647058824 5.70786347227 56% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0810693472744 0.218282227539 37% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0289489691193 0.0743258471296 39% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0384787874147 0.0701772020484 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0454990551272 0.128457276422 35% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0452160306055 0.0628817314937 72% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.14 12.5979740519 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.98 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.