Twenty years ago, Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia. Using an observation-centered approach to studying Tertian culture, he concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. Recently another anthropologist, Dr. Karp, visited the group of islands that includes Tertia and used the interview-centered method to study child-rearing practices. In the interviews that Dr. Karp conducted with children living in this group of islands, the children spent much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. Dr. Karp decided that Dr. Field’s conclusion about Tertian village culture must be invalid. Some anthropologists recommend that to obtain accurate information on Tertian child-rearing practices, future research on the subject should be conducted via the interview-centered method.
The author claims that interview-centred method which his team used provides a more accurate understanding of the child-rearing traditions in Tertia and other islands compared to the observation based methodologies adopted by Dr.Field. while the author's claim appears to be convincing in the beginning, on closer examination the argument reveals that it relies on assumptions having no supporting evidence and lacks cogency.
To begin with, the argument relies on the assumption that the interview is unbiased and reliable. The assumption that the interview is a valid source of information is a stretch. information gathering techniques such as interviews and surveys tend to be unreliable and the outcomes of these techniques can be biased based on some factors including but not limited to the cohort, the nature of questions, the number of questions and the interviewer themselves who drive the interview. Inclusion of metadata of the interview process such as the nature of the questions, the cohort and other factors would strengthen the argument.
Second, it is rather bold of the author to assume that observations recorded 20 years ago would be valid even today. while this appears to be a valid assumption, it is by no means the truth. In a world where the only constant thing is change, traditions and cultures are bound to change or evolve over the course of time. As an illustration, some exotic cultures which previously allowed for polygamy have now completely abandoned polygamy and similar things are bound to happen with cultures as well. Given the limited evidence it is fallacious to discard the observations recorded in the past by comparing it with recent observations.
Third, it is unjust to discard Dr.Field’s observations based on the topic on which the children spent their time talking about. The underlying assumption here can be that the children of same age group were considered. it is not uncommon for young kids to be emotionally attached to their biological parents irrespective of the environment. but as and when they grow up they interact and communicate with the people around them and become less attached to their biological parents. it is highly likely that Dr.Karp's interview targeted young childen which caused a bias in the result. Due to lack of several key factots the author’s conclusion is wholly unwarranted.
In short, the argument is poorly reasoned and is not completely convincing. To evaluate the argument better one would require solid evidences and additional data on the scientific study conducted.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
samples:
https://www.testbig.com/story/gre-argument-essay-topic-21-outline
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 412 350
No. of Characters: 2114 1500
No. of Different Words: 214 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.505 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.131 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.933 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 160 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 96 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 63 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.692 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 20.295 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.692 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.334 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.633 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 230, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Field
...ation based methodologies adopted by Dr.Field. while the authors claim appears to ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...d methodologies adopted by Dr.Field. while the authors claim appears to be convinc...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...pporting evidence and lacks cogency. To begin with, the argument relies on th...
^^^^^
Line 11, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Information
... source of information is a stretch. information gathering techniques such as interviews...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 105, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e of the questions, the cohort and other factors would strengthen the argument. ...
^^
Line 15, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ctors would strengthen the argument. Second, it is rather bold of the author ...
^^^^^
Line 19, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...years ago would be valid even today. while this appears to be a valid assumption, ...
^^^^^
Line 27, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mparing it with recent observations. Third, it is unjust to discard Dr.Field&...
^^^^^
Line 29, column 35, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Field&apos
... Third, it is unjust to discard Dr.Field's observations based on the topic on wh...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 33, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...n of same age group were considered. it is not uncommon for young kids to be em...
^^
Line 35, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...nts irrespective of the environment. but as and when they grow up they interact ...
^^^
Line 37, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ttached to their biological parents. it is highly likely that Dr.Karps intervie...
^^
Line 37, column 29, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Karps
...parents. it is highly likely that Dr.Karps interview targeted young childen which ...
^^^^^
Line 41, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...;s conclusion is wholly unwarranted. In short, the argument is poorly reasone...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, second, so, then, third, well, while, in short, such as, talking about, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2245.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 410.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.4756097561 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49982852243 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06001928507 2.78398813304 110% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 204.123752495 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.539024390244 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 672.3 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.9870471748 57.8364921388 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 118.157894737 119.503703932 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.5789473684 23.324526521 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.94736842105 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 19.0 5.15768463074 368% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 14.0 5.25449101796 266% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.119144602283 0.218282227539 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0321663346205 0.0743258471296 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0526602518655 0.0701772020484 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0321663346205 0.128457276422 25% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0526602518655 0.0628817314937 84% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 14.3799401198 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.5 12.5979740519 115% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.18 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 117.0 98.500998004 119% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.