"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
The issue of whether the best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership is cooperation is a contentious one. While wach side has its strengths and weaknesses, I believe that people should be trained according to cooperation rules, because it helps to build stronger relationships between young people and increases the efficiency. In addition, once people get used to work as a team, they will start to solve complex issues with ease.
First of all, instilling in young people a sense of cooperation brings the relaxness to the office or workplace. Moreover, this relax environment helps employees to build stronger relationships rather than undermining each other. To illustrate let us look at the example of Boston Consulting Group, a top tier management consulting company. All of the BCG consultants work as a team on every kind of cases such as digital transformation, investment management etc. In this way, they do not need to trap each other to get delegated. Hence, all the evidence above demonstrates that working as a team rather than individual competition is more efficient.
Furthermore, young people are able to be shaped for complex bussiness issues. If an enterprise educates its employees according to rules of cooperation, in the future, it will be able to handle most of the complex problems which cannot be solved by a single person. For example, Turkish government have started to give additional courses for ministries to enlarge their way of thinking. As a result, Turkey's international profit from international relations increased by 10 percent.
Admittedly, some may argue that competition is better that cooperation. This is true especially when it comes to works that requires single individual's know-how. An android developer, for example, always tries to increases his coding skills, and tries to adapt new trends in technology, but does not really care about the personal relationships which is not necessary in his job. However, the above argument does not constitute a sufficient to support to claim that all of the works can be done by talented people, because most of the jobs in industry requires teamwork to get most benefit.
In conclusion, although there are cases that individual competition is useful, we cannot generalize it to whole industry or other fields. As long as needs of corporate life does not change, teamwork will remain as a key factor for success. In fact, teamwork and cooperation is unescapable in every side of our life.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 342, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: All the
...top tier management consulting company. All of the BCG consultants work as a team on every...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 214, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'increase'.
Suggestion: increase
...developer, for example, always tries to increases his coding skills, and tries to adapt n...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 467, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...e a sufficient to support to claim that all of the works can be done by talented people, b...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, look, may, moreover, really, so, still, while, for example, in addition, in conclusion, in fact, kind of, such as, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.5258426966 77% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.4196629213 72% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 14.8657303371 47% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 33.0505617978 79% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 58.6224719101 96% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 12.9106741573 139% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2107.0 2235.4752809 94% => OK
No of words: 407.0 442.535393258 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.1769041769 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49157444576 4.55969084622 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.00157017911 2.79657885939 107% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 215.323595506 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.567567567568 0.4932671777 115% => OK
syllable_count: 650.7 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.2370786517 99% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.8322538428 60.3974514979 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.35 118.986275619 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.35 23.4991977007 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.25 5.21951772744 177% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 10.2758426966 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.243740707755 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.0831039109588 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0758088955206 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150359130593 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0667264976115 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.1392134831 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.8420337079 105% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.1743820225 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.76 12.1639044944 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.66 8.38706741573 103% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 100.480337079 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.