The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree

Essay topics:

The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

In contemporary world, there is competition everywhere. There is competition in jobs, government, industries etc. So, one would assume that to become an exemplar or a good leader, an individual should imbibe a sense of competition, but in my opinion, it cannot be further from the truth. I propose that cooperation is as important, if not more important, than competition, hence I agree with the prompt. I shall present my case with the help of a couple of examples.

Firstly, a sense of cooperation is the most important quality that a person can possess in contemporary world to be a leader. In other words, it is very difficult to be at the summit in a competitive society such as ours alone, without any help from others working in the same field. For example, if a company manufactures smartphones, then it is imperative that it cooperates with the other companies in the smartphone market as it is beneficial for all of them. Apple and Samsung are known to be one of the most fierce competitors in this field, both of them are the juggernauts of the industry but they cannot exist without the help of each other. Apple relies on Samsung for manufacturing it's essential parts while most of Samsung's revenue comes from Apple. Imagine if they did not cooperate with each other-- would they thrive in such a dynamic market segment? Would they be the leaders that they are? It would have been very difficult for them to do so without cooperation. Hence, cooperation is more essential than competition.

Furthermore, cooperation instills in people a sense of leadership that competition simply cannot. While an individual cooperates with someone, he or she gets to gather much more knowledge than he or she would have amassed otherwise. If, for example, within a company, there is competition among it's workers, then it is almost guaranteed that no leader will emerge from them. But if a person works with others, without any competition, then he or she gets to learn new skills, the person can imbibe more knowledge about the work he or she is doing and about the environment that he or she is working in. All of these information forms the basis of the qualities that make a good leader. Hence, without a sense of competition, the qualities that make a good leader are very difficult to impart into a person.

Some people say that a leader who can compete is required in today's world and a leader who cannot compete will not be able to grow. But I have established in the above examples that competition is not always good. There are some cases where cooperation plays a vital role in developing a person's character and his or her leadership qualities. To conclude, in contemporary world, if you want to lead, then cooperation is the best way.

Votes
Average: 5.8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 611, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...nt that he or she is working in. All of these information forms the basis of the qualities that m...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 289, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...tion plays a vital role in developing a persons character and his or her leadership qua...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, furthermore, hence, if, so, still, then, while, for example, such as, in my opinion, in other words

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.5258426966 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.4196629213 129% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.3162921348 133% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 33.0505617978 157% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 64.0 58.6224719101 109% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 12.9106741573 155% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2279.0 2235.4752809 102% => OK
No of words: 476.0 442.535393258 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.78781512605 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67091256922 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85363337972 2.79657885939 102% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 215.323595506 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.457983193277 0.4932671777 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 730.8 704.065955056 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.38483146067 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.8405799554 60.3974514979 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.9583333333 118.986275619 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8333333333 23.4991977007 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.21951772744 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.83258426966 186% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.156751764687 0.243740707755 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0460468943218 0.0831039109588 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.043185364597 0.0758088955206 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0872301855508 0.150359130593 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0331526906985 0.0667264976115 50% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.1392134831 78% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.8420337079 124% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 12.1639044944 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.66 8.38706741573 91% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 100.480337079 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.