Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.Write a response in which you discuss the e

Essay topics:

Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.

Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

The writer of the argument claims that it is government’s direct responsibility to supply financial support for major cities to ensure they thrive. The author further reasons that a nation’s cultural traditions are not only preserved in major cities, but also generated primarily. In what follows, I will discuss my response to the claim, and then explain what I think of reason upon which the claim is based.

Admittedly, major cities require more attention and support from the government in various respects. One need look no further than societies basic needs including education, safety, occupation, industries, and as well culture. Indeed, the greater the city, the greater the population of the city; and the more the number of people, the more facilities and financial support are required. More schools are needed for training our children as well as teaching them the nation’s cultural traditions. One must admit as well that parents and peers can teach the cultural traditions to the children. After all, government, in my opinion, can intervene in this process positively and effectively.

Yet there are some serious problems with the reason upon which the claim is based, in that the author overgeneralizes the idea of “thrive”. To clarify, it seems that the author concludes that, in all nations, thrive equals to preservation and generation of cultural tradition. However, this assertion seems somehow a little bold. Actually, the author’s reason is a twofold with both of which I disagree. First, that a nation’s cultural traditions are fundamentally preserved in major cities is not logical. For supporting example on need look no further than Major cities in north of Iran, in all of which the traditions are derived from nearby villages near the Caspian Sea. Indeed, in the past, people traveled from villages to the cities to find better jobs, and they settled in the cities. As the time passed, those small cities grew into the current major cities. Yet, their cultural traditions are strongly preserved in the villages. In fact, in major cities, due to effect of internet with the concomitant grow in communication and awareness of people, many people abjured their former traditions and adapted to the current universal culture that the social media and the internet has created.

Second, I entirely disagree with the author’s reason that a nation’s cultural traditions are primarily generated in the major cities. The previous example would suffice to illustrate my point. However, one can not deny the possibility that in some places, the nation’s cultural tradition are generated in major cities, in which event the author’s reason is creditable. For instance, in China, cultural traditions are generated in major cities and are transmitted to other cities, since people migrated to other place in order to find a new space for growth. To illustrate, due to high population in major cities in China, many individuals migrated to other places, and with time, new cities or villages have been thrived; hence, the traditions are generated in major cities and transmitted to other cities.

In sum, I generally disagree with the assertion that the government should financially support the major cities because a nation’s cultural traditions are persevered and generated there, as I clearly discussed in the body paragraphs. Nevertheless, some scenarios might prove the opposite; otherwise, the author’s reason would lack any merits. In the final analysis, the author’s claim should be assessed, in my viewpoint, by a case-to-case basis.

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Average: 4 (2 votes)
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Comments

flaws:
The second paragraph is not related to the reason. You only supported the claim.

The third and fourth paragraph are completely opposite. Try this pattern:

paragraph 1: introduction -- explain in your own words about the issue and give a thesis statement at the end. Give a reasonable not a dogmatic statement.

paragraph 2: Admittedly, there are some advantages of side A. First, ... Second, ...

paragraph 3: However, still I support side B. reason 1 + why reason 1 + example + a small conclusion for this paragraph.

paragraph 4: reason 2 + why reason 2 + example + a small conclusion for this paragraph.

paragraph 5: conclusion -- reinforce the thesis.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 27 15
No. of Words: 568 350
No. of Characters: 2906 1500
No. of Different Words: 243 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.882 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.116 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.684 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 227 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 166 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 123 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 73 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.037 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.83 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.593 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.481 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.092 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

Dear Testbig,

Thanks for scoring my essay. It seems I have serious problem in Issue task. Actually, I do not understand the difference between Issue essay and TOEFL essay. Is the only difference is the complexity of the topics? Can I approach them similarly?

Regards.

There are no great difference for TOEFL and GRE essays. The main difference is that: TOEFL essay topics are easier to understand, but GRE essay topics may mislead you.

Second, for TOEFL, you can support 3 reasons for one side, but in GRE, better one paragraph for one side, but other two paragraphs are for another side which you mainly support.

read an article:
http://www.testbig.com/forum/7-tips-perfect-gre-issue-essay

Thank you very much.
Would you mind recommending me a user to follow, as you did for the TOEFL, in order to improve my skills regarding the issue task?

Regards.
Saeed