Mass media and the internet have caused people’s attention spans to get shorter. However, the overall effect has been positive: while people are less able to focus on one thing, they more than make up for it with an enhanced ability to sort through large quantities of information and find what’s important.
Most of the information gotten online are apparently a tremendous work of some other people who in one way did research or practicalise the information they gave on the internet. However, all of these information are apocryphal sometimes and can ameliorate the conditions of which that information is needed. Just as many things are have bad sides they also have a good one which is basically what is necessary to be considered. For instance people had accidents with cars on the road but car is still the most transit means in the world also, the electric power used in our various homes/industries are basically what could kill someone and some have fallen has a victim into this perspectives. Therefore, ability to sort out information online has helped and make positive impact if we tend to ignore the aspect of the negativity part of the usage which is making the attention we rendered shorter in looking for the information.
In looking at the advantages, most of what is required is to ensure we solely scrutinize the information who get, for some reasons; this information are the main source of information for large part of people in the industries. Considering a precocious bread factory industry who want to situate his industry in a location as a branch for some set of people. And in doing that he has to look into some factors such as the weather conditions, tranquility of the area and target customers, apart from doing physical survey, the information needed will involve much more than physical view. Also, he will have to know the competitive industries in the vicinity. So all of these information will be needed from online and it has to be sorted without taking much of his time. However, this has not put them in corner of not being able give attention to some other necessary things needed by the company such as raw materials.
Another reason for agreeing that surfing information online or mass media has not lessen the view of surfers from putting attention into what is actually necessary is that, sometimes this sources helps reaffirm claim especially in an environment that is critical. For instance, in a board meeting among the investors of any company where there is need to quickly get information to buttress their idea. These sources are used and it does not affect any other conditions of focusing in their main business.
In conclusion, I will agree that information gotten on mass media and internet will be a positive view if considered there usage as comppare to mere shortening the view of people.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 196, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...y gave on the internet. However, all of these information are apocryphal sometimes and can amelio...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 334, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'had'.
Suggestion: had
...tion is needed. Just as many things are have bad sides they also have a good one whi...
^^^^
Line 1, column 678, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... and some have fallen has a victim into this perspectives. Therefore, ability to sor...
^^^^
Line 3, column 670, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...e industries in the vicinity. So all of these information will be needed from online and it has t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 83, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'lessened'.
Suggestion: lessened
...nformation online or mass media has not lessen the view of surfers from putting attent...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, apparently, but, however, if, look, so, still, therefore, apart from, as to, for instance, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.5258426966 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 61.0 58.6224719101 104% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 12.9106741573 163% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2118.0 2235.4752809 95% => OK
No of words: 433.0 442.535393258 98% => OK
Chars per words: 4.89145496536 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56165014514 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78687153937 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 215.323595506 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.503464203233 0.4932671777 102% => OK
syllable_count: 690.3 704.065955056 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.10617977528 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.2370786517 74% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 23.0359550562 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 60.1414628651 60.3974514979 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 141.2 118.986275619 119% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.8666666667 23.4991977007 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.6 5.21951772744 165% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 10.2758426966 68% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.176556646248 0.243740707755 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0587657834563 0.0831039109588 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0330824958985 0.0758088955206 44% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102555926315 0.150359130593 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0446716959703 0.0667264976115 67% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.0 14.1392134831 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.06 48.8420337079 88% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.1743820225 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.67 12.1639044944 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.38 8.38706741573 100% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 100.480337079 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 16.0 11.8971910112 134% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.2143820225 118% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.7820224719 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.